Forbidden Lust
by A-BenjaminHale-Story
Summary: Story idea by FeralG3: Sixteen-year-old Alex Dunphy never paid much attention to boys until Vince Campbell, a passive yet tempered bad boy dead set on paving his own way through life started classes at Alex's high school. Protective by nature with repressed trauma deep inside, will Vince be able to win over Alex and her family while struggling to fight his own demons?
1. Chapter 1

Forbidden Lust: A Lost Life

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

**This story was done in collaboration with FeralG3. She came to me with a good idea, and we decided to work on this with one another.**

Every morning I wake up at six am, on the dot. It doesn't matter if its a weekend, summer vacation or one of the rare days off I manage to get from school, I'm always up at six in the morning with no questions asked. Ever since I started high school my body's become adapted to being woken me up at six. I'm not sure why this is, for every morning, just like this, I'm so tired I don't want to open my eyes. My body is stiff, preventing me from sitting up at first. It usually takes me a good three to four minutes every morning to wake my body up enough to actually prepare myself for the daunting task of out of bed, this in spite of my mind running a million beats per minute.

Once I am up, however, I am up. I throw myself out of bed and quickly hop into the shower, hoping that I can beat my older sister Haley and her two hour readiness routine. She always takes the longest showers, meaning on the days I do not beat her to it I always lose a good thirty minutes off my morning routine, which can throw me completely off schedule and ruin my day for good. If you haven't already noticed yet, I am a girl of strict routine. I have always made sure to stick with what works and I don't stray away from it.

Everything down to the way I dress, what I eat for breakfast, what time I need to be at school by, where I sit at lunch and how I do my homework. This basic yet very complex routine at times can be hard to meet with all the crap that goes on around me both in school and at this house, yet I have always managed to keep it with me through the tests of time, for it is what I am able to attest to as being my main reason of success in this life.

I had come to adopt these routines in middle school after discovering that a steady routine and solid foundation of morals is the best way to maintain a healthy and stable lifestyle. Of course there were tweaks that needed to made along the way, but once I got to high school I'd locked down what I believed to be the best avenue for success. It would quickly become the very backbone of everything I'd do.

Within the last three years I've fought very hard to maintain this steady course of action, which in turn has allowed me to achieve the best grades in my class by far. Not only limited to grades, my academic resume is quite impressive to say the least. Surrendering fun activities and social interactions, in my eyes was a necessary part of implementing this fool proof plan. It may suck at times, but I know that once i am in college and getting my life together I will be in a much better spot then my co-parts spending their days partying and throwing caution to the wind.

Standing under the steady stream of coursing water over my body, it's easy for me to think about these things and get down on myself for what has still not gone good in my life. I can lie to myself all the time, yet there have been so many things I have missed out on in my seventeen years on this earth; from prom to homecoming, a genuine connection to someone, a solid group of friends. There's really no one else to blame for these faults then myself, for I have always been the one to ostracize myself from those around me.

My efforts to change my course of thought to something else have proven to be futile once more, as there I just can not seem to get this nagging thought out of my mind. I have gone through so many years of my life without really doing the things I would deem to be fun. I've never been one to branch out and do the things that most high school kids my age enthrall themselves in. Usually I am ale to put aside my feelings of loss long enough to involve myself much deeper into the great escape of homework. Yet like most morning the last two weeks, the flood of emotions I receive every morning pegs me with the same burning thought... When will enough me enough?

I manage to push these thoughts aside as I exit the shower and make my way towards my room, where I quickly dress myself and put the minimal makeup required. In doing such I begin to once again think about the life I wish I'd had, the life that could be mine if only I just pushed myself a little harder to try and make some friends. It comes so easy for me to isolate and rationalize these feelings of emotion that I have when filling my mind with self talk of abandonment and the loss of my childhood I've experienced at no other hand but my own.

Taking those deep seeded feelings I've reflected and actually moving them forward in a constructive manner has proven and continues to prove itself as one of the most frustrating feats I have yet to conquer. It is my biggest fault, my most predominate character defect by a long shot. It needs to be fixed.

If only life were as easy as getting good grades I would be the most popular kid in school by far. I look to my sister, Haley, and how she had been so popular throughout the years. How she's been able to garner the love and support of her class, having them at her fingertips. In a way I want everything she's come to have. I want it more than anything in this world. Yet I know that in order for me to obtain such a status, I would have to surrender my life to the cause, something that I just could not seem to talk myself into doing.

At seven on the mark I am perched waiting by the door for my mother to arrive. I would go join her in the kitchen, where she usually spends her early mornings milling around trying to get everything settled for my brother and sister before their days start. She has always loved my brother with all her heart, spending most of her time coddling him with showers of love and affection.

She and my sister have had some issues over the years but now their relationship couldn't be any better. They go to the mall together, cook dinner with one another, watch sad movies and cry together. Ugh! It makes me want to vomit sometimes just thinking about it. Then there's me, a stark comparison to be had from the way my siblings are treated. For some reason, it seems as though I have come to receive nothing but continuous criticism from my mother, even when it comes to the most trivial of things.

This isn't always the case though. Ninety percent of the time she is still kind to me. She can have her moments with everyone I suppose only it seems to be that I am some kind of an exception. Don't get me wrong, she is a great mother who is supportive of most all the decisions I make in life. The only time she becomes a real pain in the ass is when it comes to decisions she feels I should not be making... The most recent example of this being my decision to take on a summer chemistry class on top of band and the stack of summer homework that I have to complete.

Her logic behind her 'necessary' critiques of me would be that she I overwork myself. She's mentioned to me before how I do not give myself enough time to have fun in life, it's always about work. I'm not going to sit here and tell you she's wrong. I'm reminded every morning of those problems. To my self I can not lie, yet I would never admit such a thing to her. Instead I find my way around it, mostly by making up these false stories about my friends and I going out when I'll just go to the library and study for five hours. I guess in theory its better then having my mother make friends for me at seventeen years of age.

"Are you ready to go?" My mother asks clutching the same handbag she's had for the last six years over her left shoulder with the same smirk on her face. Her usual mom jeans and a t-shirt sitting somewhat frazzled on her body, indicating she was more rushed this morning as opposed to others.

I nod in approval of her advances and stand myself up from the stairs. I don't let her see me study in the morning. She will give me to much grief about it. I'll have plenty of time to study before class and cram for my exams. I walk out having finished a chapter in my Steven King novel only to be hit by a the hot California air. Usually the temperatures are cooler this time of year, but today it's hot, making me regret wearing skinny jeans and a sweater to school. I can only hope it's the usual bone chilling temperature in school today.

Once I am situated inside the family car and we have made our way I begin my morning ritual of wishing for just two things to happen. One, that my mother doesn't cause me any strife on the way there, and that I can hopefully avoid Robbie for the remainder of the day today. Both of those evils would without a doubt put me in the worst possible state of mind before going into todays school day.

The chances of my mother talking to me is very high. There isn't much I can really do about that one. Robbie is a different story, for over the last couple days I feel as though I've done a pretty good job of dealing with his childish games Even though he has been handling the situation with complete immaturity, I feel as though I have been doing my best job of taking the higher ground, and not bothering to engage him with this petty nonsense.

I broke it off with Robbie after three dates because it because clear to me that his one and only goal was to have sex with me, not pursue a relationship. Something I do not care for. Since entering middle school, I promised myself that I would save my virginity for the right person. There's nothing that appealing about engaging in wanton sexual escapades with someone that come a couple days after I will hate myself for. I don't understand why people seem to do that these days, it never once sounded appealing to me.

I usually don't even go out with guys. Robbie was one of the only exceptions. The only reason I bothered to go out with him was due to the fact that he had been asking me for three years. I did it more or less to get him off my back. Of course it turned out to be a disaster, leading me to believe that if I had just kept on ignoring him he maybe would have caught on. Grown up in the last year or so of school maybe.

I've been able to and can continue to handle him though. Most people in school know about his deplorable behavior and have ostracized him from their circles. People I don't even know coming up to me and protecting me when things get too dicey for me to handle. When it all comes down to it the though, the whole thing can be very wearing. Just the worry and stress alone of what's to come when I arrive to school not knowing what his plan for me may be really drives my desire to build a solid group of friends who can support me when I need them.

"Alex." My mother breaks me from my chain of thought. My tunnel mind, as I like to call it, causing me to completely forget that I am in the car sitting with her. 'Will you be joining us for dinner tonight?"

"Uh. Yeah." I say fixing myself in the front seat as we come to an intersection.

"I'm making your favorite." She smiles wide in anticipation of my reaction.

"Sounds delicious." I give a half ass laugh as I look out the window again, trying to collect myself once more before continuing on our drive towards my high school.

I know full well that my mother knows I am having issues at school. While I do my best to hide it from her, I know there is only so much I can do to keep myself from carrying it all over my face. Besides, I made the mistake of telling Haley about it, which in light of her return for college has been doing everything she can to get on mom and dads good side. Even if it means playing informant for their nosey bidding.

It makes me worry somewhat about what I do tell her. At the same time, however, she is really the only person I can talk to about things like this. While my mother has not yet brought anything up to me I know she wants to say something. Her motherly instinct calling for her to make a move on me and make the best of what could turn out to be a turning point in trust within our relationship.

I'm smart enough to know that sooner or later it will come up. If I am able to get ahead of things now and bring forth this conversation in my own words, I can better manipulate the conversation to go in my favor. If I allow my mother to make the first contact then it could go south. Words can get mixed up and my life could face even more worry then it needs. These thoughts run through my mind, bringing about this burning desire of mine to make first contact, allowing me the upper hand in what comes of this whole situation.

"I have a problem." I say to her as we come to a stop at another stoplight.

"What's wrong?" She looks to me immediately with concern "Are you okay."

"I'm okay, mom." I grunt out "Just drama here and there is all."

I watch my mother sit back and think for a second. I can tell she is trying to come up with something profound to say. Something that she thinks will ifx all my problems. She has always been that type of person. A try hard of sorts when it comes to saving the day. A lot like me in school. Putting all her effort into her children and making their lives as good as she can. It made perfect sense to me. So I let her sit and think until finally she opens her mouth.

"There will always be drama Alex. Best thing you can do is not engage in it." My mother gives me the most obvious advice I think she could have gave me in that situation. Even though it carried some meaning to me.

"Kids who seek drama also seek attention. By that statement I should ignore it, which I have been doing for the last couple days." I continue on "Yet the drama keeps getting worse and worse the more I try to avoid it." Our light turns to green and we continue growing closer to my school.

"Well yes." My mother nods her head "When your a child and you don't get what you want you throw a bigger and bigger fit until you end up getting what you want." She laughs "You used to do it all the time with me when I wouldn't give you candy." I groan to the analogy even though I see where she is coming from "Eventually, you would tire yourself out and not throw a fit anymore. If you don't give them the reaction they want, eventually they will give up, and move onto someone else who will give them the attention they want."

I nod to this, while understanding this simple analogy I over analyzed it to the point of not really thinking of it in that context. Of course grown men are not like babies, and I do not know how far Robbie is going to take this before he does end up getting what he wants, but I see where my mother is coming from. Wise advice none the less I brush it off to some extent, not focused all that much on the semantics of her speak.

"If your analogy is right then this person should have stopped by now yet they continue to escalate their resistance against me. I have done all I can to ignore them and fend them off with non answers and placation already." I state as we pull down the street my school is on "By all means I should give it another couple days before worrying myself with coming up to another alternative."

"Your a smart girl Alex. You'll figure it out." My mother smiles as we pull to a stop "You should talk to Haley. I'm sure she's had her fair share of high school drama expirence."

"I'd go to her if the answer was pulling hair and calling people bitches." My mother cracks a smile "Sadly that is just not me. I have more important things to worry about then petty drama, only it seems to consume me more then I would hope it would." I continue on my robotic answers to everything.

"Well there are a lot of different ways to deal with these kinds of situations." I grab my backpack and open the door "I'm sure you'll find the best way." My mother gives me a confident smile which I can not help but smile back to before walking up to school, feeling somewhat better about the situation i'm going into.

It's been hard for me at times to relate to my mom on a personal level. Hard for me to understand that I am cut from the same cloth as her with some of the things she says to me. It sounds terrible that I actually think this way, but it's true. She is a Haley kind of girl, and I am nowhere near the two of them by any sense of the meaning. I'm quiet, reserved, unpopular to sum it all up. They know how to deal with drama using behavior I would never in a million years come to understand or even dream to use. Not so long as I am still on top of my game.

Taking a further look at what she said, though, I can see more and more where she is coming from what she tells me I need to ignore this man's behavior even more then I have. This runs my mind as I walk into school and immediately head to my locker. As always, I don't bother to look up or engage with anyone. I am hoping to avoid Robbie at all costs, I just have to get my books and head to class. Yet just as I am about to leave I hear his booming voice calling my name on the corner of the intersection where the math and science hallways intersect.

I give a slight groan, knowing full well there is nothing I can do to avoid meeting him. I should have waited for Val or Skyler to meet me at the front door, for I know that he would never dare engage me when they are with me. Their cold and unforgiving tactics always seeming to push him away. Yet my need to study pushed me to make a bad decision once more. Now I'll have to be the one who gets myself out of it.

"Hey." He greets me with this arrogant look. His jeans sagging like the want to be gangster. His sleek and slender figure propped up against the wall, clearly displaying a black band t-shirt. His hair is messy and unkept from what I would have to guess is a long night of video games unwisely played instead of studying. I wonder to myself why I even bothered going for this man in the first place.

"Hey." I greet him with a hurried look on my face "I have to get to class early to study can this wait until after?" I try to buy myself some time, yet am unable to do so as he catches right through my lie and lures me over to him with a stiff groan and annoyed scoff to my rushed persona.

"Alex Dunphy." the man swallows hard "Always to busy to visit an old friend?" I remain silent hoping he will give me a chance to rush off, my heart racing as I stand equal distance from him "Seems you never have time to talk anymore. Even the people who care for you." He softly laughs to my annoyance of the conversation, turning serious after a couple seconds "Look, I just want to say I'm sorry for the way I've treated you the last couple of days." He swallows his pride in a move I was not expecting from him.

"It's okay." I say to him "No hard-"

"Let me make it up to you." He cuts me off before I can advance my escape "Before you say no I'll get us reservations at Amanos. Their chicken alfredo is to die for."

"I think that after everything going on between us it wouldn't best if we just went our separate ways." I try to let the kid down easy "I appreciate the gesture, Robbie. I just don't want to make things more complicated than it has to be is all." I shake my head knowing he is not going to like it one bit.

"Nothing is going to happen." The man reiterates "Lets just call it an in person extension of my apology to you. A good deed for all the bad ones I gave you over the last couple days."

"There is nothing that needs to be reciprocated Robbie." I smile out of awkwardness "I think that this is a good place to just put things to rest and move on with our lives."

"I don't see how that is going to make things better." The teen responds hurried like "There is a lot of unresolved things that I feel we need to work on before we can move forward. Unsettled business."

"Robbie." I back away a little bit "I would love to talk about this but I really have to go." I try to pass him but am unable to cross the hall after his cold, harsh hand grabs my wrist to stop me, his eyes now filled with anger at my persistent and very cold like rejection of him. The pursuit of me having come to an end in his eyes there is nowhere good to go from here. I prepare myself for the verbal ass kicking as the man yanks me towards him.

"What?" He lets go of me, laughing as he shakes his head in response to his actions. "Was it something I said?"

"Leave me alone." I say only to be quickly retorted, attempting to step back once more yet unable to do so with the heard of students heading through on route to their classes, trapping me with the deranged man.

"I just don't get it. I really don't." He shakes his head. I stare him down in light of everything that's happened. I need to let him know I'm serious. I've playacted him to much just by speaking words to him. The anger inside my body rising over the last three days from turn after turn of harassment from him just puts me has finally got to me. I am ready to snap on him as he spits nothing but gibberish to me. I don't bother to listen. My eyes are focused on him. I don't break a sweat nor my stern eye contact with him. It's all over once he finishes his sentence.

Then something catches my eye. The mirror reflection of a shadow figure stepping up behind him from the row of lockers. I dart my eyes towards this figure. He has come up close, standing just a couple feet behind Robbie, making him look a pitiful fool in size compared to whomever this man is. I can not get a look at his face, for he wears a black hoodie, yet I know just from gazing back and forth towards him that he buff, tall, and strong.

He could just be a passer by pinned in from the heavy flow of students moving down the hallway. Yet once he is able to get around Robbie he stops right next to him. The once valiant date of mine turning his attention towards him with a disgusting trace up and down his body. There is no telling what could happen. I grip my textbooks tight and hope for the best, ready to run if something were to happen.

"I think she's made it clear she doesn't want you." The teens stance soft voice carries a relaxing yet powerful reflection of authority that I can't help but feel my body shake a little bit. From what he's said I know he is here to protect me. A passer by standing up for me in the best way possible. Yet I still shake in fear of the unknown. My body not good at handling the presence of other people more dominate then I.

My legs continue to shake as Robbie turns to confront this mystery man. I prey to god that he doesn't. I have never seen this man before, never heard his name or even got a look at his face. All these unknowns are going to drive me insane if I do not figure this out. I watch as the two men size one another up. My mystery savior having a good foot on Robbie, making any fight unobtainable for the tiny young man. Yet he does not back down, in what I would have to guess is a show of power and authority over me up until the last second.

"There's nothing going on here." The man responds with a timid look on his quickly sheltered face. The man tilting his head down ever so slightly in realizing that he would not be able to last more then a second with the man standing before him. The fight would not come close to being fair due to the stark size comparison inability's gap between the two clearly polar opposite young men. "Just a disagreement is all."

Refusing to even acknowledge the boy with even so much as a nod, I watch in pure disbelief as the stocky man looks directly to me, revealing what has to be the most attractive guy I have ever seen. His chocolate brown eyes piercing my tingly body with every second he looks before my figure.

He is much taller than me, in fact he towers over me more so then Robbie. His muscles are so defined, his body so perfectly cut and chiseled like a statue. Though he covers himself with a sweatshirt the physique of this unknown man has me far weaker then any artificial fear I'd once carried.

The way he looks to me, with this dying look of care and concern for me. FOR ME! is to die for. I'm wet just looking at him already. Then comes the smile. His warm, inviting smile makes me want to jump right into his arms and run away with him. As if he himself were to be the answers to all my problems in life.

"Are you okay?" He asks me, his voice just as I remember it from minutes ago. A raspy yet light tone piercing every inch of my body. His presence shining a bright light on my soul like no one else has done before. I am almost so taken aback from his attractiveness that I can't speak. Yet I manage to overcome the pit in my stomach and respond to him through a stifled lump in my throat. Not from tears, yet from the pure bliss of love.

"Yes." I nod avoiding eye contact the second that I speak to him "Thank you."

"Don't mention it." The man looks around "Guy seems like a real douchebag." He looks to find Robbie nowhere in sight. The once strong boy now having slipped away into the night in the hopes of making a great escape from certain death if he were to oppose the mystery man.

There is an awkward silence that follows. I am screaming to myself to say something. Anything to him. I know he knows how embarrassed I am, for I can feel my face flush hot and red, growing worse and worse with every passing second. There is no escaping this. I have no idea what to say. I'm stuck here, brain all mushy from his hotness. I rake my mind for something, anything to say to this beautiful man standing here before me.

"I. I uh. I have to get to class." I mutter out before beginning to back away slightly. A confused look on the mans face as he cocks and eyebrow trying to figure out what is going on.

"Okay?" He breaks pose to give a warm smile "I guess I'll see you around."

I quickly excuse myself from the situation and head to class. I don't dare think to look back towards him partly out of embarrassment and party out of my want to just die for that boy. It was nice of him to do that for me, sticking up to Robbie like that. Most people just walk by and say nothing. I continue my walk down the hall and into my class where I take my seat and collect myself, finally being able to breath for the first time since entering the school ground. I have a test this period, I need to study. I need to focus. Forget about my no named hero.

'Mr. Perfect was a one time thing' I say to myself over and over 'It's to good to be true.'


	2. Chapter 2

Forbidden Lust: A Recognition

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

 _It's been five days since I met him and still no word. I am starting to grow worried our one-time encounter is nothing more than a blip in my radar of life. I am beginning to feel like I should start moving on. I have midterms to worry about and a band concert just around the corner, it just doesn't seem like occupying my mind with this rubbish is really my best option. Yet therein lies the problem; I can tell myself a million times how much I want to leave it be but my mind just won't allow me. If only I could see him one more time, I would feel better about this whole thing._

A stiff knocking upon my bedroom door scares me from my journal writing. I close it quickly and sit up, unsure of who is there. Sliding the notebook under my bed sheets I stand up and open the door, revealing none other than my older sister, Haley, who walks in with a perplexed look written across her face.

Since she'd got kicked out of college she's been living around the house more often. I'm, not bothered by this, for not much as changed since before she went off. We don't' share a room anymore, but we do see each other on a fairly regular basis. Sometimes she'll drive me to school or take me for midnight snacks after mom and dad go to bed. In some ways, you could say we've grown closer, but I am not really sure of that. While she still antagonizes me on a regular basis I have caught onto her being more and more supportive of me. Even so, I would hate for her to find out about this mystery man, for it would only create more complications in life I just don't need.

"What are you doing up here?" I hold my hands behind my back as Haley walks over to my window, examining it for a couple seconds before turning to face me, her hair still damp with the scent of rose from the shower she just took.

"Mom wanted me to get you for dinner." The girl fixes a book on my shelf "She's been worried."

"Why?" I ask to the shrugs of Haley.

"I don't know." The girl pops a seat on my barren desk "Why don't you tell me?"

"There's nothing to say." I quickly shoot back to her. I can tell that she doesn't buy my words, however, a slight Schoff comes from her, my older sister shaking her head as she scratches her arm.

"I find that hard to believe." The girl hops down from the desk "It's Sunday night, seven o'clock and night and not a single textbook is thrown across the room. There's not an ounce of homework on the desk and you have a look in your eye like your trying to hide something." I try to avoid eye contact "Your not going to fool me."

At this point, I weigh the pros and cons of telling Haley what's going on. I know I'm made, and knowing Haley she will not let this go. I swallow hard, trying to muster up the right words and courage to push this out of me. I never thought I would be put into a situation like this, causing me to feel almost light-headed in the wake of its arrival. Sitting down on the bed I hang my head down, the stress all-consuming. I can't bear to take this much longer.

"You can't tell mom." I reiterate as Haley closes the door to my room and takes a seat next to me.

"Lips are sealed." The girl pulls down the sleeves of her sweatshirt.

"There's this boy I like in school." Haley's face widens with a smile "But he doesn't seem to notice me."

"I think... Every person in the world has felt the same as you at one point or another." My sister goes on "Do you know who he is? What his name is at least?"

"No." I reiterate with embarrassment "We talked like once in the hallway and I just froze up. I didn't know what to say. Didn't know what to do even." I stand up to hide the forming tears about to break the levees "It's just so frustrating because he's sooo hot. I can't seem to wrap my head around it."

I do everything I can to hold back my tears. It's such a cliche thing to do for a girl my age to cry over a hot boy, and I never thought I'd be put in a situation like this. Ever. My mind races with thought as Haley lays down on my bed, staring up at the ceiling as we both remain silent for the time being.

"What is it about him that you like?" Haley asks me grabbing the pen from my bed cover to play with "Has to be something about him that's driving you this crazy over him."

"He's cute." I blush with embarrassment "He's tall, strong, kind, caring, protective." Haley sits up "He protected me the other day when Robbie went on one of his rampages."

"Your knight in shining armor." Haley smiles me too with the connected relation.

"I don't know. I just felt like there was something between us. I want to see if it will yield."

"I wouldn't think like that." Haley shakes her head to my confusion "Going into these kinds of things with expectations will only get you hurt. I really liked this one guy in my high school, dreamed of him every night. Turns out he was only using me to get to my friend. There I thought he liked me, now he's playing house with her."

"Okay." I nod furiously, trusting that Haley is far smarter in this department then I "It's not so much I have expectations more so I want to see him again. Talk to him."

"That's the great thing about being as beautiful as you are." I blush as Haley stands up "You don't have to worry about whether or not you're good enough." The girl stands before me "There are a million guys who would bend over backward to be with you. They just don't have the balls to say it. Everything happens for a reason, and the reason he came to your rescue and aid was that he saw something in you, something he couldn't seem to shake, just like you." Haley sits me down on the bed "When I first met Mike I felt the same. I couldn't believe how someone that hot would actually go for me, a college drop out with nothing to offer at the time. Now we laugh about it, because everyone who has ever crushed on someone, has thought the same thing."

"So I should just talk to him?" I ask fiddling my thumbs.

"Your smart, beautiful, and best of all confident. You can take the hardest courses in your entire school and pass them without so much as one single effort." The girl smiles at me "If you make a mistake, you learn from it and you go in the next day harder then you did before. It doesn't have to be complicated, just go up and say hello."

I laugh after Haley says this. One of her biggest pet peeves of me is my logical approaches to things like this, especially my what if questions. Right about now I have a million of them, almost bursting at the seems in wanting to ask her these. I am lost in a jungle of my own confusion. I am able to recognize that I do tend to make mountains out of molehills when it comes to things like this, but how could I not? Haley is actually beautiful, I am like that nerdy type of beautiful that guys just want to get with to say they've fucked a nerd. I've been there before, and it's a horrible feeling. I would hate for that to be the case with him. It would break my heart.

"It all just seems too complicated." I shake my head with a grin.

"It's only as complicated as you make it." Haley puts her arm around my shoulder "The more you practice it, the harder it's going to be. Get out of your head, and just go with the flow."

"That's not really how I do things."

"I know it's not, which is why we're going to practice." The girl hops up, pulling my arm as a pit of fear builds in my stomach, the uncertainty radiating through me as Haley stands me int he middle of the room.

"What do you mean practice." My older sister shushes me before walking to my closet, looking through the clothes for all of two minutes before pulling out a thin long sleeve shirt. Red sleeves with a white base bearing the numbers '88' in the middle. I don't remember getting that shirt, but I suppose it looks pretty good.

"The only way your going to get comfortable talking to guys is if you practice." Haley looks me up and down, nodding as she tosses the shirt onto my bed "Keep the jeans on, they'll accent your thickness." She smacks my ass to my unfortunate surprise, a giggle coming from her as she walks over to the closet once more, pulling out a pair of red and black converse with white laces, tossing them before my now worried figure.

"You don't mean we're going right now?" I ask as Haley pops her head out from the closet.

"What other time would we go?" She smiles at me as my eyes widen.

"No!" I grab the shoes and neatly place them by the end of my bed "Haley I have school tomorrow. I can't be going out this late at night." My voice raises when I start to beg people "Please."

"Late?" Haley looks to the clock reading seven fifteen in the evening "We got another two hours before you go to bed Alex I know you like the back of my hand."

"Haley-" I start but am cut off by the closing of the closet door.

"Your scared aren't you?" My sister lays out two bracelets on top of the shirt already placed upon my bed.

"Yes!" I exasperate with a laugh "Of course I'm scared."

"Why?" She looks to me sorting through the thin selection of perfume atop my dresser.

"Because we're about to go somewhere I don't know and talk to guys I don't know in the hopes of somehow making me less scared," I tell her exactly what's on my mind. Receiving a perplexed look.

"Just like your going to be doing this week with your knight in shining armor?"

I suppose Haley made a good point here. The only way I was going to get better was to practice. While all the semantics about it seems to rub me the wrong way, these feelings of disloyalty and sluttiness coming to mind I throw on the shirt she'd laid out and put on the shoes. I take a look at myself in the mirror to find a girl I'm not used to seeing, a girl who for the year had hidden behind the ethics of her work, not one to shine or stand out. It kind of makes me want to cry thinking that this person I never knew was hidden inside me this whole time. Maybe its time I start living for the now instead of constantly pushing myself to the future.

"Look at you." Haley walks behind me, her hands placed firmly on my shoulders "Your beautiful."

"You knew this whole time didn't you?" We both stand there looking into the mirror.

"It's not hard for me to figure out when someone's got a crush." Haley smiles rubbing my back. "Though now's a good time than any for me to be a big sister to you."

I smile at this. While Haley had a streak of being mean and obscene to me I never thought of her any less because of it. She'd always been there for me in some way, and for that, I truly am thankful to have her in my life. I stand before myself in the mirror grazing up and down my body. I look good, the confidence filling every inch of my loins as time passes on. There is a part of me that doesn't want to move. To instead just stand there, basking in the glory of everything I'd gone through to get where I am today. It's a magical feeling.

Once we finished admiring ourselves in the mirror we headed out. Haley was good at getting mom off my back and for some reason found the ultimate excuse for us to head out this late on a Sunday night. I knew if she were to discover the real reason we were leaving, she would have never allowed me to go out. I let Haley do the talking before we slip through the front door and head to a small arcade/ice cream shop in our town. I'd only been there once for Lukes birthday party, but the daytime influx of small kids and moms laid in no comparison to the older crowds that took over in the nighttime hours. My nerves begin to build as we pull in, the mass amount of cars and kids my age walking in seemed to have this sort of effect on me. I'm not scared, more so anxious about what people might say. I've never been known to have fun amongst my class so coming out here is but a radical change for me.

"You ready?" Haley asks turning off the car.

"Read as I'll ever be," I smile to her.

The walk from our car to the front doors was the hardest for me. I thought about dipping out, heading to the Starbucks some couple hundred yards down and talking with my favorite barista. I don't know why that came to mind, but it did, and I seemed to be completely entranced within the idea until the sounds of arcade games and laughter came to recognition. Looking up I could see the mass of humanity there, the hundreds of kids playing games and chilling out. My heart beings to race as Haley opens the door and ushers me in. There is no going back now, and I know that with all I have inside me. While it's easy for me to remain calm on the outside, I'm ready to jump out of my skin on the inside.

"Let's get some ice cream." Haley points to the back of the arcade "It'll make you feel better."

I nod as we walk there, my mind racing as we pass kids of all ages playing games and having fun. It's a foreign concept to me, and I am not so sure whether or not this was the right idea. Standing in line, I continue to look around me at the groups of people. A group of girls sit to my left, maybe a year younger then me or so while a group of guys behind them laughs obnoxiously at whatever joke or comment was told.

"Get something light." Haley tells me "Like a frozen yogurt."

"I wanted a Sunday." I laugh looking to my older sister for an answer.

"Part of doing this is creating a false reality about yourself." Haley smirks to me "Eating a Sunday makes you look like you don't care about yourself. Dating sucks because you can't be yourself at first, but once you have him around your finger you can eat as many Sundays as you want."

I don't agree with this, but I don't have time to protest before we step up to the counter and order our food. I get a vanilla ice cream with nothing on it. I would have much rather liked to portray who I really then hide behind some facade of someone I am not. Yet as I have discovered a lot this evening, I have no idea what I am doing, and I trust that Haley will send me in the right direction. Though I have never been one to blindly follow, a little bit of that tonight will not hurt me in the slightest. We get our ice cream and head over to a couch, where we sit down amidst a couple other people talking about whatever it is they are.

"Is it good?" Haley asks with a smirk.

"No." I scowl in displeasure "It's got no flavor."

"That ice cream will be your best friend tonight." Haley nods to me "A lubricant of sorts for what's to come."

"I don't understand."

"It's a conversation starter." Haley leans back licking her spoon clean "The most basic things you would never think just might lead you to something more." Haley sits up and looks around "Him." she points "Talk to him."

I look over to my right and find a kid my age leaning against the wall. I am completely overtaken by his macho attitude and it turns me off for some reason. While he is good looking and seems like a good guy, it just looks like he is trying way too hard. I shake my head and flush read. "I don't know about that."

"Come on." Haley looks to me with eagerness "What do you have to lose?"

"It could go bad?" I look to her continuing to nervously eat my ice cream.

"Like ninety percent of every interaction you have with guys. If you don't try then you'll never know. If you never know when you'll never learn what to do." Haley rubs my back "Just go for it."

I am almost about to piss my pants with nerves as I stand up to talk with him. I don't know what's going to happen, but I say a silent prayer that everything goes well for me. The last thing I would want is for something bad to happen and ruin my night right off the bad. Haley gives me one last smile before I walk over to him. He is about ten or so feet from me, so I take my time in walking over to him. My heart is racing once I approach him, my mind blanks on what to say as he looks up to me. His brown eyes staring me down with fury as I firmly grasp my ice cream bowl.

"Hey." I smile in a nervous release as the kid removes his earbuds to hear me. I don't know him from first look so I am not really concerned about making a bad impression on him. At least if things do go bad then I don't have to worry about seeing him in school tomorrow or worse, having to work him on something in the future.

"What's up?" He asks tracing his sight up and down my body not even trying to hide it.

"I like your shirt," I comment drawing my attention to his Avicci T-Shirt trying as hard as I can to make the conversation go anywhere but down from this point.

"Oh yeah." He smiles "I'm trying to go see him in concert sometime next month."

"Oh my god, I wish I could." I fake some kind of excitement even though I know almost nothing about the guy, for instead just trying to read the situation and make the best of what I can with it "Ever since stories came out I've been dying to see him." The man smiles at me, removing his last earbud, something I have to take as good.

"I think he's coming to LA sometime in the next six months but they haven't released any dates yet. I'm like constantly checking the website to see if they made a release so I can get tickets." His phone vibrates and he stares at it for all of five seconds before swallowing hard "My brothers here to scoop me." He says "Maybe I could get your number. Let you know if I get tickets or something."

My heart skips a beat. I've never been asked for my number before aside from school sanctioned work. I am thrilled to have got it, and I smile wide to let him know my appreciation. "Sure." I say typing my name and number into the cell phone "Shoot me a text or something."

With a brief smile exchanged between us he is gone, and I am left standing against the wall able to breathe a sigh of relief. Looking over to Haley she gives me an exasperated smile, holding her hands up as if to imitate the touchdown symbol. I find this to be so funny I laugh out loud, finding my way back to her with much enthusiasm as I take a seat on the couch, both of us waiting for the other to say something.

"That wasn't so bad was it?" Haley asks tossing her empty ice cream cup into the garbage followed by mine "It's a lot easier then you'd think it would be." She smiles as we both lean back and relax.

"God it was so nerve racking though." I smile at her "I gave him my number though." Haley looks to me. "Its kinda mean though cause like I don't really want to date him or what not."

"Then don't." Haley swallows hard "Just because you meet a guy doesn't mean you have to go after him. If that were the case I'd be having like a million conversations with guys I don't care about."

Of course, Haley would make some half-witted comment about that. Just to show her stature and love from other people I am not surprised she would. I shake it off my shoulder and smile "I just feel kind of bad about it."

"Roll with it then." Haley stands up and looks around "No one's saying you have to end it there. Though I'm doing these exercises more so to break the learning curve I if something happens then go for it, baby."

"I just feel kind of wrong about it." Haley sits back down next to me "I got my eye set on someone then I come here and hit on other guys it just doesn't seem like the right thing to do."

"Rule number one of dating, Alex." Haley takes a water from a passing waitress and hands it to me before taking one for herself "Never make yourself to available. It makes you look desperate. And no one likes desperate."

"I'm not desperate." I shit up somewhat offended that Haley would insinuate that.

"I'm not saying you are I'm saying it makes you look that way." Haley tries to correct herself "A guy is going to run to the hills if you make it seem like you got a set eye, so it's good if you have other things to do or if you talking to other guys, it'll make him work a little harder if he really wants you."

Despite what I would have thought about Haley's knowledge and self-loathing she is kind of a genius with this. In a life where I'm not completely addicted to school and everything that comes with a life in academia, I would have loved to learn this much sooner than now. I try my best to remember as much as I can before she smacks my shoulder, a smirk coming across her face as I look to her with a confused look.

"What are you waiting for?" She looks to me "There's plenty more fish in the sea."

For the next half an hour I bounce between three or four different guys, usually with a five-minute break between us. I make sure to keep it as casual as I can and without much incident as not to surprise them with my eagerness and now growing confidence amidst their angsty teenage attitudes. Just like with a hard class in school I find it to be easier and easier to talk to men as the time passes on, and I somehow manage to get three more numbers from guys before severing ties for the night. My confidence is up, and as we leave I am completely sure of my abilities tomorrow, that I will be able to talk to this mystery boy the next time I see him. All thanks to Haley.


	3. Chapter 3

Forbidden Lust: Unexpected Encounter

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

**I apologize for taking down the second chapter late last week. There were some issues with the post that I had to fix. I will be posting chapter four today as well so three chapters in total. Hope everyone is enjoying their week**

The high I received Sunday night from making a change in myself carried over well into Mondy. My enthusiasm and excitement for the possibility of seeing my crush and actually having the courage to make a move on him carried me through the day of hard tests and discouraging assignments. Even the prospect of this uplifted me, and though I went through nearly half the day without seeing him I was happy to find that my overall spirits were lifted. Haley was nice enough to send me a motivational message before my first class, giving me more power and strength.

My day, however, would take a turn as I got called down to the principal's office after my fifth period. I nervously made the walk, excused from class for what I had to assume was nothing good. I panicked a little bit when the teacher called my name. I am usually far away from any and all trouble at school, so to get this cryptic summons was somewhat unsettling to me. Though logically I knew I hadn't done anything wrong, there is always that period of time you sit in the office running through every possible thing you could have messed up. I was no exception to this rule, for the entirety of the six minutes I sat in wait, I ran through everything I could have done wrong.

The receptionist, a nice woman with long brown hair, called my name, and I was taken to a back room I had never been in before. I took a seat at the desk and waited some more. This time much shorter than before until the door opened to reveal my guidance counselor. A wave of relief came over me as he stepped into the door. Mr. Oxlan was always a refreshing sight for me to see, for I knew whenever I saw him I would be void of trouble. Though I was confused as to why we were meeting in the school's office I stood up and greeted him with a smile.

"Miss Dunphy." He began every engagement we had before putting a folder down on the desk "I'm sorry about the arrangments but they've conveniently decided to renovate my office this week."

"No worries." I tell him quietly "Kind of threw me for a loop though."

"Got something you want to tell me about?" He smiles taking a seat.

"No, sir." I nervously laugh fixing my hair "Nothing of the sort."

With formalities out of the way, and the calming sensation of knowing that I had not screwed something up beyond my own repair, The nature of our conversation took a rather dark turn. Supposedly, unknown to me. I had been placed in two of the wrong classes. They were to easy for me. American History Honors and Honors Bio. I kind of had a suspicion of this when I saw my schedule at the beginning of the year, but I didn't think much of it giving my lackluster A- last year in AP Chem and World Civ led me to miss the cut on AP classes this year. I guess it wasn't the case, and I listened as Mr. Oxlan explained this to me.

"The system is designed to set a particular score mark for reaching AP classes. Last year we renovated the system over the summer, and some of that data was last. We had to go back to paper records until just last week when we realized we had placed you in the wrong classes." He apologetically states to me "I know this sucks, and I am sorry about the confusion in which we've seen to bring you today, but we would like to move you into both of these AP classes starting as soon as tomorrow." The man comments to me as my eyes widen.

I didn't really know what to say. I was taken aback in some respects due to my growing suspicion of how I would manage a full course load of AP classes, especially now that I am jumping into them late. I'm not so much worried about the actual change or the coursework, more so the makeup work that I am going to be forced to do most likely. It unsettles me a little bit, but I hold my head up high and try to look enthusiastic around the change.

"What would we be talking in terms of course load?" I express my doubt "With midterms coming up I really wouldn't want to overwork myself right out the gate with these classes."

"I've talked to your prospective teachers and tried my best to reiterate these concerns to them, as I know you so well." The man holds his hands up to my laughter "You would probably get a little bit of work to catch up on, take some tests and quizzes after the winter break but mostly just jump in where they left off. I think both your teachers and I feel as though you can handle to course load without issue."

"I appreciate that." I look up to him. My mind now put to ease as he hands me the revised schedule and sends me on my way. Off to complete my last day of school before my new schedule is implemented.

My mother was thrilled to hear this news. I pick and choose what to tell her, and this was one of those things I knew she would love to hear about from me. She almost jumped for joy when I told her, both her and my father is very supportive of the decision to move me to an upper level of class based upon my growing educational sphere. It would have surprised me if they weren't and I'm more then thrilled to have made them proud with my efforts and the correction of what could have been a crucial mistake in continuing my pursuance of Yale.

The next day I focused a lot on moving my attention to catching up in these classes. The thought of my crush being in one of them crossed my mind, but I was not sold on the idea as I packed up my things and headed off to school. It was one of the reasons why I didn't want to occupy my mind with the worry of that Sunday night and take myself away from the much-needed attention of my studies. While that night was fun, and its reliance still echoed through my mind with growing intensity as the days passed, the awkward night of interaction really did concern me. Such a hard balance between work and play, I was thrown for a loop this week. While I wanted so badly to express myself and make a fun change in my life, things just didn't seem to work out that way for me, and I was thrown back into the midst of my studies as if I had never left them to begin with.

My first class would be in the third period, with my last class being my sixth period. Second period I had a test, giving me little worry about what would happen the third. It seems I have this weird ability to turn things off in my mind when I need to focus, a gift of sorts to me I don't have any idea where I could have got. I guess my desire to achieve and improve myself outshined my ability to worry about some arbitrary thing that didn't really matter all that much to me. I would face that fight when it came, not worry about the unknown before it happens.

Coming to the end of my second-period class I did my best to calm my nerves before entering my next class. I always seem to get nervous but today it seemed to shine a whole lot brighter for some reason. I had this weird feeling. May it be joining the class late into the semester or just nerves before joining a really hard history class, I did what I could to calm my nerves before heading into the class and putting on my laser focus.

Call it an intuition or what not, but as soon as I walked through the classroom my eyes drew left, focusing upon the very person id' been chasing the last week or so of my life. The person I'd gone out and put myself out there for sat left row close to the door back three seats, and there were two seats positioned directly around him. I was shaking, to say the least, as I quickly averted my vision and headed to the teacher's desk, where I introduced myself and collect a tivy of classwork I'd missed in the months prior. It's not all that much, but it's still enough for me to be somewhat concerned about my ability to finish before the midterms come my way.

Once I am done talking to the teacher, I turn and face the class. Of course, since I am more than two months late to class by this point, everyone stares at me in confusion as to why I am here. I know they are harmless, many of the people I'd shared other classes within the past. That gives me a sense of ease as I walk down the far aisle, approaching the man with every step. As he comes to clearer recognition I am taken aback by just how incredibly beautiful he is. His hair just as soft and luscious as I remember. His eyes like pools of love just begging me to pounce. I want him so bad I can feel it building in my body, yet I make no move yet. I have to be calculated.

I don't want my first move in this class to be an advance on a boy that I like. I need to watch and wait. Find my perfect time. I instead take a seat next to Stacy, someone who I don't know personally, but has been in almost every one of my classes since the beginning of high school. She brings me a weird sense of comfort, and I capitalize on it as soon as I can, taking out my notebook and pen along with the sorting through of the papers I received, going over them amidst a continuous look over of my undying crush, his head now out of his phone and on the teacher.

Never would I have thought I'd see him here, especially in an AP style class. Not that he doesn't seem smart, he just did not strike me as someone who would achieve this level. There are plenty of hot guys in these classes, in fact, some of the hotter I've seen in my day. But him? I just didn't see it. Usually, the kids in here are brute, harsh, and so competitive they think any kind of attraction or kindness to them is an exploited weakness, making it almost impossible to make friends with them amidst the torrent of their endless attacks. But him, that's not the case.

Once class begins I focus in on the work. I am in no position to be behind, for I am already behind enough. The class is midway through the second world war, one of my favorite subjects seconds to science and math. I catch on quick where we are and find the time to do a little bit of the work I was provided. Things seem to be going alright. I keep my eye on my crush, the only way I can refer to him now aside from coming up with some sad pathetic nickname that would just ruin it for me in my head. I can tell by the way he is sitting and paying so close attention that he doesn't have many friends in the class. I haven't yet seen him acknowledge one person aside from the teacher and another guy, but that's been it. This gives me a potential opening for me to talk with him at least in the future.

"Alex." A voice whispers next to me, catching me off guard as I break my trance from the prolonged paragraph I was pretending to so intently focus on "Did Hoffman give you the class notes?" I turn to Stacy with confusion.

"No." I shrug in confusion "He only gave me these papers." I hand her the pile as she goes through them intently for all of three seconds before handing them back to my desk.

"You're going to want the class notes. They're important to the analysis of power paper we have due next week,"

"Do you know where I can get them?" I ask leaning down as the teacher corrects papers amidst a host of whispering students amongst one another in some kind of silent pow wow.

"I can share mine with you." The girl smiles "I'll send them to your E-Mail address when I get home."

"Thank you." I smile in full appreciation of the girl's efforts.

"Don't worry about it." We exchange a smile "If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask."

As soon as she says that I tap her on the shoulder, catching her attention in some fearful way. We gave each other a look, which was only escalated by the frantic look on my face. I shouldn't have made it so obvious to her that I was practically bursting at the seems to know anything about the boy i liked, but for some reason, I made it far to clear, and the result of such was worse then I would have thought.

"Something wrong?" The girl hesitantly asks, as if she were unsure of what to say.

"No." I dart my vision away before she can read any more of my facial structures as to suggest that something was wrong "I'm just thinking." I lie as the girl gives me a sympathetic nod.

"It must be hard for you." Stacy comments as I lean back in my chair "Coming here to this new class forced to really adapt yourself on such short notice. I can't even imagine."

I simply nod to her comments without really knowing what to say. I constantly bounce back and forth between whether or not I should say something to her. I bounce back and forth between this for a couple minutes, unsure of whether or not I actually trust her enough to tell her something of that caliber. I learned earlier in my days of school that I shouldn't tell people things. It never seems to end well for me. Though I can in some way establish reasonable doubt, and an installation of false trust, I am just too worried about it to make a deal out of it.

Class continues on and I do my best to pay attention. Times seems to crawl past as we reach the halfway mark, which will finally allow me time to remove myself and think of something to do. I've never really been one to make a huge deal out of things, especially this. But for some reason, my mind is hooked on it, and I just can't seem to figure out a way to get past it without causing some kind of problem for me. Stacy would be no help, and Haley is off with her boyfriend somewhere in the north of the state so she probably won't respond. I do my best to calm myself and focus on the matters at hand, but my mind is just too cluttered for me to do that.

With ten minutes left I'm beginning to feel a lot better about things. I'm finally at the point where I've got over my initial fears of the unknown and am starting to enjoy myself a little more. A quick writing assignment followed by some reading and lecturing have helped me to take my mind off the situation at hand. Everything seems to be going well until our teacher stands up and hands out a sheet, this detailing a group project we will have to start. My heart sinks. While we can pick our own partners I am sure that everyone has already decided who they will be working with, leaving me in the weird position of having to find someone on the fly.

The class is ended early so we can meet up and work with someone. I am almost sure I will have to work with him, for no one has gone over yet, leaving really just him and I to have not been picked. It's almost as if some weird force has taken over my life to where everything is falling in place for me to make a move. First I get put in his class then I am forced to work with him. I'm not one for believing in god but its hard for me not to think that something greater isn't at foot right now. If I can overcome my initial fears of being with him, maybe I can make something happen.

Standing up with the class to get partners, I decided I am going to keep things strictly professional. I am in no position to make a move yet. I would need to get comfortable with him. Of course, this really negates what Haley had told me to do by just going for it and hoping for the best result. He is in my class and if something were to happen it would utterly ruin the both of us in some way. Grabbing the things I head over to his desk, catching him writing things down on a piece of paper. His body so perfectly situated in the seat with broad shoulders and soft face. He is intimidating in so many ways, but I swallow my fear and approach him none the less.

"Hey." I smile warmly like, his head raising to catch my gaze as he leans back with a half smirk of his own.

"How are you doing?" He asks as if he doesn't know me. Maybe he doesn't? That would be really awkward if it were to be the case, something I would have to deal with in some capacity later on.

"I'm good." I nervously shift my body weight back and forth "Just wondering if you wanted to work with me on this project." I look around the room "Seems like every one taken by now."

"That's usually how it goes." The man smiles at me "But yeah, I'll do this thing with you."

My heart skips a beat as I take a seat in front of him. I look around at all the other groups continuing to meet up and talk, going over classwork and beginning to plan out their project. Maybe I should have pushed to group with Stacy since she is a friend of mine and I know how she works. Instead, I am stuck here with this now silent and very reserved boy. I guess I'm up for the challenge of balancing work and play if anything.

"You just joined this class today?" The man asks me leaning forward.

"Yes." I smile at him "Alex Dunphy."

"Vince Cambell." He responds as I swoon over the lust of his dream boy name.

"Nice to meet you." I blush awkwardly, his eyebrows squinting slightly as if he were trying to zone in on something that was to be stuck on my face, drawing a fearful look upon my face.

"I'm sorry." He smiles sitting back "I just feel like we've met somewhere."

Do I play stupid for him? If I were to tell him the story of how he protected me from Robbie then it might make this whole thing look premeditated. I try to play off a confused look as we both try to nail it down. My heart races as I think of something to say. Things are going pretty well by this point and I do not want to lose the chance I have just yet to some stupid, misguided comment I could easily avoid.

"Maybe in passing," I tell him, warranting a nod.

"You didn't happen to be at the arcade Sunday night?" My heart sinks down into my stomach "I was picking up ice cream for my mom and I swear I saw someone who looked just like you sitting on the couch."

"I don't know." I laugh nervously "I was there with my sister around seven or so."

"Wow." He leans back scratching his neck "What a small word."

"Yeah." I smile rubbing my shoulder "Really is."

There is an awkward silence. I hate it when things like this happen because I have no means by which to control what happens next. I guess that's true for everything, but the awkward silence always brings about an evaluation of what you said and how you could have done so much better in saying something different. I look over some of my papers the professor handed me as we reach five minutes to the bell. If I can get through this last five minutes I'll be set.

"For the project." The teen's deep voice snaps me from my thought "Since we have to focus on one of the major powers of the second world war, I was thinking we could do Japan." I nod as he slides me a packet "I've found that their scope of influence and the devotion to victory throughout their time-fighting in Asia and the Pacific is worth noting over the Germans control in Europe or Italy's fascist rule." He flips to a page in the back "They did this interview with a former commander on this page. Really interesting stuff."

I'm almost shocked by the way he talks. This guy gives me so much confusion I don't know what to do with it all. First, he is protective and outspoken, then he is quiet and reserved, now he is smart and logical? I'm almost ready to pop the question now I'm so excited to be with him. I hold back though. The golden gloss of the outside may hide some rotten, ugly mole on the inside that'll just overpower everything. In reading the article through quickly, I find that it is indeed a rather interesting piece of writing, and I agree to work on it with him.

"Really?" He questions me as if to not believe it "I'm glad you like it." I nod in approval "Most people in here have discredited me before I've passed halfway through my speech."

"I think that incorporating everyone's opinion is how the best projects are aced." I somewhat lie to him. While I would not go so far as to discredit him and make him feel bad, there is a time and place for letting people know the criticisms you have against their work. Right now is just not that time for me.

"So you want to meet up sometime? Get working on this?" He asks me out of the blue.

I fumble for a second, unsure of what to say. "Yeah." I nod with a smile "What works for you?"

"I was thinking tonight." The boy leans back in his seat, a whiff of his cologne filling my nose "We don't have to though. I was just thinking we could get a head start on it is all."

He must have seen my rather worried face. I wouldn't know if tonight was going to work. I certainly would not want to bring him home to my place this soon. My mother would never allow that to begin with. Besides, with Luke and Dad up to their usual series and Haley out doing whatever she's doing, I would find it hard to focus anyways. Though I would like to be naive and keep things innocent I'm not sure how well I could control myself around him for long. Even sitting here I find it hard to keep myself from grasping him and never letting go. To think I would somehow be able to manage myself around him for two hours of work would be near impossible for me.

"I'm sure tonight could work." I speak against my better judgment "I just don't know what my parents are doing for dinner and my brother is all over the place. My older sister is just, ya know?"

"Oh, I know." Vince smiles to me closing his textbook and taking my wrist, his skin so soft against mine I don't bother to protest to his removal of a pen cap and some forced writing on the back of my hand. He smiles at me as he examines the work, raising his eyebrows with an exacerbated sigh "Could have done that a lot better." He shakes his head in disapproval as I examine the ten digits on my hand "Shoot me a text and let me know."

"You don't have anything going on?" I ask suddenly, his face looking up to mine with confusion as I realize the implication of my question, my heart starting to beat rapidly as he places his stuff in his backpack.

"No." He shrugs "I'll be at the gym most likely. Visit some of my friends at Moneray park." He smiles just as the bell rings to dismiss the class "I'll be around though. Shoot me a text if you can and I'll swing over."

I can't help but feel like he's trying to get with me as I slowly pack my things up and head to my next class. That's what I want? Right? Or is it something else? Why else would he tell me he wants to swing by on the whim of a text message if he didn't have something sexual planted in his head? I worry that's why he's been so nice to me. I always worry that's why guys are nice to me, but I like to think I'm more than just a body for their personal pleasure. I know I am more then that, and I would undoubtedly refuse to engage him if such were to occur. I may have fallen for his lust but I'm not going to revert a principal of mine because of that. I can stay strong.


	4. Chapter 4

Forbidden Lust: Trying Times

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

I decide to walk home from school. It will give me some time to clear my head at least. Wrap my mind around everything that went on in class today. I could have got a ride, but some days you have those moments where you just need to be alone, and today is one of those. I have a lot to consider with Vince, especially given the soon to be nature of our interactions. Although our interaction was minimal compared to my daily scope of interactions, it was big for me, especially with someone who I could see myself being with if the cards are played right.

I get to thinking about the things he said to me, the way he said them, and what it means for me. I have always been the kind of person to over analyze a situation and turn it into something it's not. While I would rather not do this with my recent encounter with Vince it's been hard for me not to. My mind just takes over, one thing leads to another and soon I can find myself making up intentions that may not be there. It has proved helpful in terms of my current relationship with Robbie, but detrimental for many other people in my life. I would rather predict and expect for things that may never happen than have to deal with the reality of things will.

About three-fourths of my way back home, I stop at a local market and pick up a drink. I stay there for a while to browse the various assortments of food and drink that they have to offer. Anything at this point to get my mind off things. I would rather not think about what happened, more so the extreme amount of work I have to get done before the day is out. It's the exact reason I have never bothered to pursue men in the past. They only create more drama for me. It is never how I would expect things to go. Whether it be the petty nature of their wants or the push of me to break out of this constructed shell they seem to think I am in. Whatever it is I don't like it, and I would rather they just accept me for who I am, and work to understand the things I do and where I come from in doing certain things. While I am always open to making changes I refuse to change certain things about myself. That I will never do.

Arriving home I can feel the seat sticking to my back amidst the heat of California raining down before me. I am sick to my stomach with anxiety as I place my backpack on the couch and try to cool myself off. I can hear my parents in the kitchen laughing and talking about something. Their voices aren't in full tone, but I know they are in there. I'd much rather avoid them if I could, saving me the agony of having to explain to them my day and what went on. Checking my phone I catch a glimpse of Vince's number written out on my hand. I sigh at the desperate attempt to romance he seemed to project before taking a picture. The sweat has already smudged it a good bit, making the numbers almost illegible. I snag a photo to prevent losing it when I wash my hands.

A large sudden roar of laughter comes from the kitchen, breaking me from my phone. I can hear the soft patter of footsteps growing louder. I brace myself for the pokes and prods of my mother, only to be met by Haley, who seems just as pleased to find me as I am to find her. From the looks of it, she just woke up within the last two hours, as she wears a pair of nylon shorts with an oversized t-shirt and her hair up in a bun. Her eyes droop down, laden with a look of exhaustion that couldn't be masked no matter how hard she tried.

She smiles at me, pulling me into the living room with an exasperated look "Thank god you're home."

"What's going on in there?" I ask curious about the laughter yet not wanted to explore it myself.

"Ugh." She rubs her face with annoyance "Luke built this ant maze in school today." I tilt my head with confusion "Yeah. My feeling exactly. Mom and dad are like, dying in there over it."

"Seems really anti-climatic." I grab my backpack and sling it over my shoulder.

"Thirty minutes. They placed bets on which ant would win it all. It's been thirty minutes."

"Say what you want they do find ways to keep themselves entertained."

"At the expense of the whole house." Haley rolls her eyes "Woke me up early today. I don't have work till seven tonight and I need my sleep for the night shift."

"Just sleep in my room." I offer her "It's a lot quieter. I have to do homework anyway."

"Oh my god, you're a lifesaver." She wraps her arms around me with joy "Thought I was going to have to rent a hotel room or something. Inconsiderate pricks."

As I collect my things and head upstairs with Haley I do my best to think of what to say with her. While I want to spill my guts and tell her everything that's going on I worry she will take control of things. Haley is a great sister, but she has a way of making you do things you'd rather not do. I've experienced this first hand with the ridiculous cover stories and begs she's made to me when sneaking in late, or when she told me to sleep with Robbie so he would stop bothering me. Of course, I don't listen to everything she tells me, but her suggestions seem so good-hearted it is hard for me to say no to her, as I would hate to disappoint my older sister and make her seem more inferior to me then she already is. I have basically turned into a yes man robot with her at this point.

"Bed!" She plops down on my covers as soon as we enter "Sweet, sweet bed."

"Don't get too comfortable." I lay my backpack down on the side of my desk "This is a one-time thing."

"And I will not overspend my welcome." Haley sits up rubbing her face once more, staring at me as I read a rather upsetting message from Robbie but don't bother to respond right then.

"Hey." She squits her eyes "What's on your hand."

There is no return now. I have to tell her. It will be a matter of seconds before she discovers what it is. I could maybe get away with making up some story about science numbers or something, but I am so shot from earlier that my brain is refusing to function at the same pace it would have I not been plagued with the worry of meeting Vince. I shake my head and take a seat at my desk, rolling my chair around to face her.

"The guy I like." I hold my hand up with a smile "I got his number."

The smile across Haley's face is more then I'd expect to make me happy. My mood shifting as she lays down on the bed in some wild loopy state of exhaustion, smiling to herself as I examine the ten digits on my hands.

"I knew you could do it." She shoots up with enthusiasm "Tell me the details."

"It was like so cliche it's almost sad." I hold my head down in embarrassment "I had to move to a higher level class for English and he was in it." Haley's eyes go wide "I was in complete shock."

"That is so random it may as well be planned out." Haley laughs.

"It gets worse." I shake my head leaning back "We had to get partners for this history assignment, and he was the only one left who didn't get a partner, so I had to work with him. He wants to come over here tonight so we can work on the project together. Get a head start on a project due two weeks from now."

"He sounds just like you." My sister sits criss-cross on the bed "When is he coming over?"

"I don't know." I turn somber "I don't know if I want to see him too be honest with you."

"Why not?" Haley shoots back almost instantly "This is like your chance to make something happen between you two and you're going to back out of it?" I try to keep myself from blurting out at her in annoyance as she continues to harass me over my comment "Do you know how many girls would kill to be assigned mandatory time with their crush? I mean, just think of the groud you can gain with him just working on this project?"

"It's not without reason." I lean forward in trying to explain myself "I just got this weird vibe from him right before we left that he was trying to get with me or something." Haley leans back listening to me "Just like the way he handled himself. Took my hand and wrote his number down instead of using paper or like telling me to hit him up whenever and he would come by." Haley's face goes stern "I think he wants to have sex with me."

"Why is that a bad thing?" Haley looks to me with confusion "If a guy wants to have sex with you, then it means he likes you in some way." My sister hops to the end of the bed "I mean, with babies like those I wouldn't be surprised." She slaps each side of my boob with enthusiasm, causing me to laugh in a knee-jerk reaction, yet returning to my serious state almost as soon as I start "Your way over thinking this Alex. Believe me."

"I don't know." I rub my arm in anxious wait "I like him, I really do. He's so dreamy and kind too. Like way more respectful then I would have ever imagined him to be based on his looks."

"Then why are you even considering it?"

"I don't want him just for sex." I whisper as if to assume someone else was listening onto the conversation from the corner of the room "I promised myself a long time ago that I was going to save myself for the right person. To make sure that the person I do give myself to is someone I really love and care about. Someone who really loves and cares for me as much as I do them. I'm not about the one and done thing. Especially with someone in my class."

"That's some holy mary shit right there." Haley laughs "Most girls nowadays hop on more guys before they turn my age then Jim Jackson was traded in his NBA career." I squint in confusion of the reference. "Basketball player?" Haley clarifies for me "Mike talks about him all the time for some reason."

I nod in approval, finding Haley's complete disregard for my concern to be more concerning then not. While I am not expecting her to pour her heart out to me about this I would have liked for her to at least see where I am coming from. It's already hard enough for me to sit here and talk with her about such a personal thing and to be mocked by it does not settle well for me. I give her a look of disapproval, seeming to hit harder then I expected as she leans forward towards me, her eyes going puppy dog as always when she wants forgiveness from someone.

"Maybe not the best reference I could have used." Her tone turning somber and dejected "A lot of girls make comments like that. The whole save themselves thing and what not. Rarely do they stick to it though? I know with Robbie it was hard for you to make that choice, and I respect you more then you'd know for doing it then I'd ever lead on."

"I appreciate that."

"When I was your age the last thing I was worried about was saving myself. I was known as this party animal who was like so out there and fun to be around. When I met Dylan it took me like a week before I gave myself to him. I just got caught up in the lust of it all and convinced myself that he was the one." She scoffs under her breath "We had a good run but things just didn't turn out the way I thought they would with him."

"I'm sorry." We make eye contact for a brief second before Haley continues on.

"I think every girl wants to save themselves for the perfect guy." Haley holds her head in somber approach "If you walk through life scared to interact with every guy you meet because your worried the only thing they want from you is sex then your going to miss out on a lot of great times. It doesn't mean you have to be a slut, but it does mean you have to carry an open mind. I can't tell you when to finally give yourself to someone, but I can tell you to keep an open mind and at least start living your life a little." I nod, a slight smile coming over my face as Haley lays down on the couch.

"You think I should message him then?"

"I think you should do what makes you the most comfortable." Haley curls up on her side "There are always boundaries you can set with him. Even now. No guy likes a girl who will do anything right out the gate. If I had to guess he'll respect you more for the wait then if you desperately throw yourself at him."

Closing her eyes, Haley leaves the room silent enough for me to hear my own breath. There are the occasional laughs and shouts from downstairs, to which I push out of my head in laying out my homework and getting started. I tell myself to do an hours worth of work and then decide on what I'm going to do. It's still pretty early in the day, and I would hate to tell him he can come over when I know he can't.

After an hour of work for every class but my two new ones, I quietly leave Haley still asleep on my bed and head downstairs to greet my parents. Luke has departed now, probably off to hang out with friends or in his room pretending to do homework. My mom is sitting on the couch watching some pointless mid-late afternoon show before dinner, and dad is at the table typing away on his computer. I go to the fridge and grab a water, the sound of the broken suction on the fridge breaking my dad's attention from the laptop and bringing it right to me.

"Hey, honey." He gives me a warm smile "How was school."

"It was good. Lot of homework today."

"How were your new classes?" He asks turning his attention completely my way.

"They were good." I smile "Got some catch up to do but I'll survive."

"Well, you let us know if you need anything." My dad smiles "It'll be a quiet night here."

I feel like my dad would be more likely to approve Vince coming over then my mom. I know both of them would probably say yes since I do not cause a lot of problems or really bother much of anyone for the most part on the count of school being so busy. I take a sip of water and lean on the counter. I think of how to ask, what I am going to say to every possible answer they will give me. Haley's talk with me sparked something inside me, whether it be fueled by the anger of her shrude response or motivation to live my life, over the last hour and a half or so of doing homework I am made up in my decision, that decision is to have him over here.

"I got a school project." I start out as my dad continues typing "I need to work on it with someone tonight."

"What time are they coming over?" My mom turns around to ask. I was more so asking dad but I guess she overheard me and responded first. I can't lie and tell her its some girl, that would be wrong. At the same time though I don't want to tell her to find out at the moment and humiliate me. I have to come clean.

"I'm not sure. I haven't let him know yet."

"Well let us know beforehand so we can set a spot at the table if they'll be joining us for dinner." My mom continues to watch the pointless commercials on the television "He has to leave by nine through."

"Okay." I back away with a smile, overjoyed that I was actually treated like an adult and not pressed on it so much that it ruins my desire to even hang out with him anymore. Grabbing my water I head back upstairs and shoot Vince a message right away. I tell him he can come over in thirty minutes, to which he hits me back within ten minutes with a shot of approval followed by an ask for my address. I can't believe its actually happening. I need to get ready.

Vince is set to arrive around five in the evening, a good hour before dinner is ready. I know the chances of him staying that long are pretty high, so I let him know ahead of time that my mom would want him to stay for dinner. Its kind of awkward having the guy of my dreams over for dinner the first time we spend alone time together, but then again we aren't dating yet, so it won't be as awkward as I think it will be. In fact, if anything now, I worry that maybe Vince doesn't even want me. For he could be using me to get what he wants

Maybe in a sexual way, maybe int he way that he thinks I'll do all the work. It's not too hard for people to know who I am given I've been bullied for years on the count that my intelligence is much greater than almost every other kid around me. It happened in middle school and almost every year after that. Even though I've never seen him before, I have to assume that he knows I'm very smart, and he may be using that to his advantage to advance his own agenda in some way. I don't really know why my thought immediately goes to the worst case every time, but in the past, its helped me so I really don't see any way that I should or would make a stop of it.

About ten minutes before he gets here I stop doing homework and get ready. Haley is still sleeping, but she so knocked out I am not worried about her waking up from my searches through the closet. I like the pants I have on, but I need to change this shirt. I don't smell bad, but its just a bad look to have on the same clothes I had in school on at my house some two hours later. I want to look presentable, but not to hot as if to try way to hard. I throw on one of my long sleeve shirts, a green base with grey sleeves. That one should work fine for me. I try to clean up my room as best I can, moving a lot of my clothes and putting them away in the closet, where pretty much any item of clutter goes by this point. In terms of things I own very few items, but clothes are a different story. All the days I spent shopping with Haley I have more clothes and I would like to admit, a lot of them worn only once or twice by now.

I get a message amidst my cleaning. He tells me he is heading over now. Should be about ten minutes or so. I wake up Haley, not really thinking about what to say or do when she does wake up but needing my space and time to collect myself before he arrives. By now I've drunk three bottles of water and have organized my room more in ten minutes then I've done in nearly three years of living in the room. I give Haley a second to pull herself up before I address her, her face looking a lot more rested now then it was when I first came home from school.

"Vince is coming over." I give her a smile as she looks at the clock "I need the room."

"Say no more." Haley holds her hands up as she drags herself from the bed, stretching out like a cat as she examines the cleanliness of the dwelling "Really went all out in here."

"Don't want to embarrass me by having a mess in here." I toss a couple things away before heading over to the dresser, making sure that no clothes are sticking out from the tops of the tightly packed drawers.

"Can't believe you were able to convince mom to have him in your room." I stop and look at her "I had to sneak Dylan up for years before she actually gave me her blessing." My face goes pale "Must be a younger sibling thing."

"She didn't really give me permission. I kind of just told her I was going to do it and she didn't protest."

"Be wary of it." Haley walks to the door "If she asks while I'm here I'll cover for you. Put in a good word to ease her mind a soul about the horrible things she'll think you're doing up here."

"Thanks?" I applaud in confusion. I wouldn't have thought mom would have a big deal with it after she approved of it. Of course she was watching TV and probably wasn't paying her full attention to what I was saying but even so, I have proved myself to her and dad that I can be trustworthy. Now with Haley on my side, I find it hard to believe that she would protest it while he was here. That would humiliate me more than anything in the world. While the through sits in the back of my mind, I don't bother to worry myself over it. As Haley leaves I finish cleaning until I hear the ping of my phone. He is here, my heart starts pumping fast as I collect myself and head downstairs.

At the front door, I hold my breath and open it. Standing in the doorway with a wide smile across his face is Vince. I notice he is wearing the same clothes from school. A pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He has his backpack slung over both shoulders ready as if he is ready to work. A mix of nerdy and hot all mixed into one. My palms get sweaty as I give him a smile, I'm not sure if I should hug him, kiss him, shake his hand or what? My mind is racing a million miles a minute, the constant fear of messing up pressing hard against my greater judgment.

"Hey." I move aside for him to step in, a breeze of his cologne hitting my nose "What's up?"

"Not much." Vince steps into the house and off to the side "Been hanging out with some friends. Got a little bit of homework done." A silence falls between us "How about you?"

"I usually do homework when I get back." I realize my comment sounds snarky "More so today though, given my new enrollment in classes i'm kind of playing catch up now."

"I hope I'm not bothering you then." The man gives me a worried smile.

"Oh no!" I shake my head "It's not all due in one day so I'm kind of picking and choosing what I do and don't do based on the level of difficulty and how soon it's assigned." We stand apart by two or so feet. I try to keep my eyes from wandering up and down his body through its proven to be far more difficult then I would expect given his ridiculously sexy demeanor and macho pose up against the wall "I have all the stuff upstairs if you want to go up there."

"I have no objections." I laugh at his weird comment as we head up the stairs and to my room. Looking back at his eyes wandering up and down the stairwell of pictures and drawings from when Haley, Luke and I were young kids. His face almost seeming to be shocked if anything "You have a beautiful home." He comments when we reach the top of the stairs "I like the walk of family you have going on there."

"It was my mom's idea." I lead him to my bedroom "Probably saw it on a home show or something."

"This may be weird." He pauses at a picture of my dad and Haley posted some three feet from my room "But I think your dad sold my parents our house last year." I can see him try to make out the face as best he can, leaning back and forth to variate his vision of it before I step in with a smile.

"He is a real estate salesman." I blush with embarrassment "He sells around here a lot."

"I hope it's not weird." I shake my head quickly "I just remember seeing him one day after school talking with my dad or something. Pretty funny guy if you ask me."

Is it weird now that he seems to be more interested in my dad then me? Absolutely. I wish Haley were here right now to guide me. An invisible version her kind of sitting behind me telling me what to say and do cause I am starting to realize that I have no idea what is going on here anymore. My mind is racing, my heart is pounding, and I'm beginning to wonder if his intention of coming here is even sex or homework related. I guess I'm just not that used to guys taking an interest in me or my family. The only thing I know is the hustle and bustle of Robbie constantly wanting to see me and trying to get me to do things I don't want to do.

Once in my room, I close the door and watch as he takes in the scene some more. It's almost hard for me to believe that this is actually happening right now. How he is here with me inside my bedroom walking around the open floor space and taking in all that is there. I am glad I cleaned the room up now, as I can see him looking across the walls at all my awards and photos of the last four or so years. There had been such a drastic change in me that I find it hard to believe he would actually show some kind of interest in me. Most people look at me from when I was younger, even a couple years ago I would have been ashamed to have shown myself to someone like him. How he's found who I am, and I brace myself for some sideways comment or sexual remark about it.

"You win all these awards?" He asks me curious like as if to not believe it.

"Over like six years or so." I sit on the bed "Most of them are achievement ones for the band but some of them are honors society and for outstanding AP club leadership." I try to be bashful but don't play it off well.

"Would have never guessed." Vince continues to peer around at the various plaques and picture frames "Not really one to wear your accolades if you know what I'm saying."

"I do." I sit up tense like on the bed "I never have to begin with."

Taking a seat in my desk chair Vince slugs off his backpack and places it beside him. By now he has stopped looking at the awards and has moved over to the homework on my desk. I worry as he stares at them for a long while, but I do not say a word. I sit and watch as he flips through them uncaring of my privacy, for when he is done he turns around and smiles at me, pointing ever so slightly towards the top paper.

"I would hold onto this." He pulls it out from the bottom of the pile "It's important."

I cock my head in confusion as the man tries to hand me the paper. I am at a loss for words. This has turned out to be a lot more awkward then I would have expected. There is something off about the man, but I cannot seem to find out what it is. He has this weird way of going about things that makes me wonder if he is all there. The long stares at my awards to the comments about my father and now this? Maybe I got myself in a little over my head with this. I lean back on the bed to distance myself a little bit as he pulls out his laptop and starts typing.

"Is our report still going to be done on the Japanese Imperial Army?" I asked pulling out a notebook from under my bed and beginning to take down some notes as well.

"Yes, ma'am." He smiles at me "The paper, I just handed you." I flip it over and begin to skim it "That paper is like an entire history of the Imperial army. How it was built, its design and tactics. Militarily and socially as well as independently in relation to its allies and it's early fights with China and the Asian Pacific." I crack a smile in loving the way he talks about history "If your able to look at their early industrialization you can see how their military benefited from it greatly. It was what really pushed them to the forefront of power in their region."

"Seems like you have this all figured out." I continue to take notes as Vince looks up to me.

"Oh, I'm flattered." He shakes his head "Only in The Second-Sino Japanese War period I'd say. Of course, I'm somewhat read on their earlier history but I really have a lot more work to do before that comes."

"I just mean you're a lot smarter then I thought." He looks up to me with a confused look "Not that I didn't think you were smart, I just haven't met you before and just, uh- based on the way you carry yourself I would have thought your interests would be elsewhere." My face turns bright red as Vince raises his left eyebrow trying to find some sort of solution to my answer, for I can tell his brain is working hard at it.

"You wouldn't be the first person to tell me that." He leans back in the chair "Most people assume I play sports or do some kind of excessive gym work out every day." I listen intently as if I were learning in class "Hell, I could barely pass the pacer test last year let alone play a full game of high school football." He laughs to himself "My interest is in learning. Knowledge will carry you much further than looks or style these days."

"That's what I've been saying." I lean forward with to him "I didn't mean anything bad by it."

"No, I know." The man closes his laptop and pulls out a notebook "Can't blame people for things they don't know." We sit there looking at each other, serious at first yet a warm smile cracking across our faces with the passing of time. That of which is broken by his handed of a notebook to me "These are just a couple pages of notes I took on the subject of our project. I was thinking I could focus on the Later Showa period while you worked on their war in the Pacific." I nod taking notes "I know it's not really necessary to draw back that far into their history but I think it will help put the puzzle pieces together just a little better if we do."

"I think that should work." I smile taking my last notes as Vince closes his notebook and laptop, putting both of them away before standing up and slinging his backpack over his shoulder "I know you said something about dinner but I have to go home." He has a genuinely sad look on his face "My mother needs me for something."

"It's okay." I smile standing up "I appreciate you coming out here at all. I'll get started on the project tonight. We can reconvene sometime in the next couple of days to go over some things."

"Yeah, that would be great." Does he smile giving a deep exhale "How about some time earlier next week? Give us a good chunk of days to get things done then we can meet up and put together the presentation for the following week."

"You live close to here?" I hand him his sweatshirt trying to prolong his stay here by just a little.

"Couple miles east of the school actually. This new housing development that was just built on Whitney."

"Those are big houses." I comment on opening the door for him "What does your dad do?"

"Finance." Vince replies as we walk into the hallway "He's partner at a firm out here. I don't really know what he does so to say but he makes enough money to support my mother and me."

"Just the three of you?" We start heading down the stairs.

"Yeah." He sighs "My sister passed away when I was twelve." My heart drops into my stomach "Really took a number us. Five years later we still don't go to checkers. Last place we all ate together."

"I'm so sorry." I mutter out as we reach the bottom of the stairs "I had no idea."

"Wouldnt expect you to." The two of us stand by the front door "Happened years ago now. Can't keep living out that last day with her anymore. It's why we moved here this summer. Took us a while but we finally did."

A long silence fills the air. I can hear my mother cooking in the kitchen and my dad continuing to annoy her with his stupid questions and silly antics. It makes this situation a whole lot worse then it is. How was I supposed to know his sister passed away? Had I known I would have never brought it up. Now things between us are weird, and I will have to live with this fact for some time now. Really wasn't a good way to end things but before I can protest or offer him something he nods his head and is out the door. Leaving me alone, standing there, wishing I could redo those two last two minutes just once. Maybe not have his last memory of me tonight be a horrific thing that happened


	5. Chapter 5

Forbidden Lust: Leaping Faith

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

 ****Please give me a review. Any suggestions are encouraged. Always trying to grow as a writer. Thank you****

"Why did I have to ask him that?"

The main question I have been asking myself for the last seven days. Seven days it has been since Vince told me about his sister passing away and I still cannot seem to get over it. I don't know what's wrong with me. In those seven days, we have seen each other in class, talked, and met up outside of school twice for upwards of our every time. I brought up my concerns to him each time and like clockwork, his response is always warm and encouraging.

"You didn't know." He will smile at me "It's okay."

But I should have known better then do that. What was I thinking asking him such a personal question? It was nearly a formality at best but jeez, I just can't seem to break this feeling that I have done this horrible thing that I can not be forgiven of. That no matter how hard I try nor the lengths I go to try and make it better, I just can not seem to fix it amidst my best efforts. I know well enough that it is all in my head, yet I just cannot seem to push it out even with the help of talking to friends or even through the shallow sorrows of Haley, who has picked up more and more work to help cover the costs of her expulsion of college that she's barely been home. I need an outlet.

Admist the frustration I feel there is always one thing that helps, busying myself. In the last seven days I have been doing nothing but homework. Aside from time spent with my family and going out with my friends once for a couple hours, I have managed to catch myself up in both my new AP classes as well as maintain a level of perfection in my other classes. It doesn't worry me at all that I have limited myself to human interaction and missed out on the Thanksgiving dance at school. I wasn't going to get asked to it anyways, why to worry myself with the hassle of it.

Come Tuesday, following the whole drama with the dance and with Thanksgiving break quickly coming my way, I roll out of bed to a text message from none other than Vince. Every time I see his name on the screen or walk past him in the halls or in person there is this awkward feeling that rises within me. While things between us have been lax, I am more than disappointed with my attitude and behavior over the course of the last seven days with him. While things between us are not awkward at all, I seem to have developed this weird sense of guilt in having brought up such a personal thing for him in our first day's meeting. While I am sure it would have come up one way or another, I am more than disappointed in having let this bother me for so long.

To receive that message today put a bad start to my morning. I don't know why, but as I readied myself for school I worried about what the context of his message meant. He wants to meet up with me at some time. In the two times, we've met up since our first time I have been nothing but awkward and cringy, trying to stick to work as much as possible while also having this grossly apologetic tone to my voice, making almost everything I say some sort of desperate attempt to redeem myself from last Tuesday. I know in the back of my mind that he knows what I'm trying to do, making it all so much worse for me. Yet amidst the torture of it all, even though our strictly academic relationship, there have been moments of clarity where we seem to meet on some common romantic ground.

"Meet me in the library before class today. Have to go over some things before class."

His message plays through my head as I get a ride to school from my mom. Our relationship has been good recently, mostly because I have rarely seen or heard from her outside of dinner and a couple family activities I took part in. I think by now I have reached an age and place where she knows I am doing just fine with things, and for that, I am thankful she has somewhat backed off of me in the last week to week and a half. Granted I continue to keep this up I could be looking at an easy ride all the way until I leave for college, which I have begun to look into even this early. It's kind of the norm when it comes to schools like Harvard, Yale, and Stamford.

Arriving at school, my mind races as I enter the library. I walk back to the study tables, where we met the last time after school to get some work done together. I take my seat and start to think. Thankfully, it isn't long before he shows up, giving me that awful feeling in my stomach that just radiates itself through you like an electric shock. My stomach turns my breakfast over as time seems to stand still. He wears his usual jeans and t-shirt outfit, a pair of Van shoes covering his feet as he steps up to me with his usual smile. A smile I do not deserve.

"Hey." He offers me a seat at the table, getting right to business as we only have about ten minutes before the first bell rings and classes will begin for the day "How was your night?"

"Pretty good." I nod in nervous approval "Yours?"

"Just as eventful as last." He gives a sigh. I remember he'd told me some time ago that his parents were debating on whether or not to move back to Wisconson where they originally lived. He'd told me in what was a brief description that the return would be done out of work, not so much choice. If his father was offered a better job in Wisconson then out here, he would take it in a second, thus ending our time together once and for all. Probably for the rest of our lives unless by some miracle we stayed in contact through the years.

It scared me at first, but I told myself not to worry about it. My parents had talked about moving before and it never panned out. The last meeting I consoled him and made some kind of a statement along the lines of support. Those were one of the moments I was somehow able to break through my awkwardness and get to him on a personal level. A real breakthrough for me that would always be retracted within minutes of us parting ways.

"How's that going for you?" I ask fiddling my thumbs under the table.

"Typical Campbell way I suppose." He shrugs with a laugh "All talk no game."

"That's usually the way it goes." I lean my head down "My parents do that all the time. Nothing ever comes out of it... Usually." I roll my eyes to his intrigue. "Camping trip was a fucking disaster."

"Ugh." He smiles to me "Wouldnt pay me a million dollars to go camping out here. Wisconson you'd have to drag my ass out there. I mean, all the scary animals and spooky sounds." He shivers in his seat "Irks me just thinking about it really." Both of us exchange a brief laugh and smile, my mind almost completely slipped of his intentions coming here until he pulls out a piece of paper from his back pocket "I wanted to give you this."

"What is it?" I open the flap as I ask.

"Its an article I found last night on our project. Seems relevant." I skim through it quickly before the sound of his clearing throat draws my attention to him "Really only an excuse for me to get you here."

My heart pounds. I break my vision of the paper and look his way immediately... I have no idea what is coming next but whatever it is I'm probably not going to like it. I can tell he is getting serious. It was something I did. It has to be something that I did. There is no way I am off the hook for what I said to him. My mind races a million beats per minute as he lifts his head up and scratches under his chin. His neck looking so soft and smooth I could kiss it right now. Maybe if I took him I could avoid the horror that's sure to come my way.

"While I am the first person to fall in love with awkward classroom partnerships with people, I think that whatever been going on here between us needs to be aired out." I swallow hard as he leans back in his chair "I don't know if it was something I said about my sister passing or something I did around it, but I like working with you. I would hate for the rest of our time together be spent walking on eggshells."

"I just feel horrible about bringing that up." I look down at the table. My mind continues to race yet still able to hold this conversation by some miracle of God. In spite of my want to just break down in tears over something like this, I have to hold my composure. He doesn't seem mad at me, thus alleviating the worst in my mind.

"When I was twelve years old my family was coming back from a fourth of July party. It was late, probably around nine or ten o'clock at night. My dad insisted on taking the back roads, claiming it would be faster than the highway with all the DUI checkpoints and speed traps they had out." Vince begins as I listen close to him "We came around this bend and just got hit out of nowhere, head-on collision from an oncoming pickup truck. Totaled our car completely. The guy was drunk or something like that. Next thing I remember I'm waking up in the hospital with a broken leg and a severe concussion." The man lifts up his t-shirt to show me a seven-inch long scar going up the side of his ribs "I had something like five broken ribs. Stitched me up real good though."

I don't know what to say. I am at a loss for words. I know the story isn't going to end well. I brace for the puncher as Vince leans back again, itching the side of his neck "My parents had some broken bones and Some deep cuts but managed to survive. My sister, Penelope, she got the worst of it. Severe concussion with internal bleeding. Punctured a lung from the force of her chest jerking against the seat belt and crushing her. She died before they could even get her to the hospital." He rubs his forehead in angst "My parents never got over it. They're all sorts of fucked up over it and they probably will be for the rest of their lives. That's why I like school so much. There isn't this looming cloud that hangs over me here. No one knows or even cares." He smiles "Fucked up, but exactly what I need in life."

He must get that feeling with me. Not the good one, but the looming cloud. It must suck, having never been in his shoes yet trying to understand what it would be like if I were to lose Haley or Luke. Having everyone who knew you know about what happened and constantly treats you different for it. Constantly check up on you. Not to mention the guilt that must float through the house. Reminds me a lot of Robbie and his parent's divorce only a lot worse. He must get that looming feeling of depression when he's with me, for me having carried with me this sense of apology everytime I see him must have been the worst thing for him. Now I don't feel guilty about asking him I feel guilty about constantly reminding him of it. Geez. I just can't seem to catch a break to save my life with him.

"I'm so sorry." I apologize, trying to craft something that isn't pitiful yet expresses my sorrow "I had no idea I was conflicting with the sanctity of your well being by saying those things. I just felt horrible about bringing it up I thought apologizing a million times would make it better in some way."

"Many people have tried and failed that method." Vince shakes his head "Can't blame em though. Most people don't really know what to say or do if I tell them about it. Really throws them for a loop."

"It was a horrific thing to happen. I can't even begin to imagine the struggle it's been for you."

"I've moved on though." Vince shatters whatever I was going to say next with those four words "Took me a minute but I made peace with it and I've forgiven my parents and that man for what he's done to my family. Made peace with Penelope as well. Preyed upon God for forgiveness and strength and he shined that down upon me. It's everyone else who seems to get fixated on it. Can't catch a break with them it seems."

"I don't want to be one of those people." I blurt out without thinking "I don't want to be the girl who pities you or feels bad for you or cares too much about it." He looks to me "It's fucked up, but its what I want."

A smile comes across his face. A genuine smile. One I haven't seen in all my time of meeting with him have I ever seem him smile so bright in my life. I could see it in his eyes. The way he looked over to me with this weird sense of accomplishment and pride in me, as if I had passed some sort of test almost. As if he had been watching and waiting for me to say that to him all along. I smile back, happy that I was able to make him smile so wide. Though conflicted on the inside a weird weight has been lifted from me. Though I have not yet been alleviated by my wrongdoing and though there still carries this weird sense of guilt inside me. I push it down and move forward. Vince being my inspiration to continue on and make the best of what I have with him now, at the moment.

"Another reason I wanted to meet with you is that I have to go back to Wisconson for a while. Couple weeks actually." He hangs his head in disappointment "Don't really have a choice in the matter. More so an obligation if anything to get out there and rebuild some bridges I burned while my parents sulk over the loss."

"When are you going to go?" I ask as the five-minute warning bell rings.

"Beheading out tonight." The man shakes his head "They sprung it on me last night. Gave me no choice."

"No warning at all?" I ask now more concerned about the project then anything.

"Seems as though my parents had considered letting me stay. Only it seems they thwarted that idea sometime between this Sunday and now. They want me out there for support."

There are two parts of me hating everything he just said. One, the project will be left in my hands now since he will be off doing things with his family. He won't even be in the state, putting the stress of all this additional work on my plate granted he somehow has made time to do it with me while there. I'm also upset because that is two weeks I will not be able to see him, thus bringing back the possibility of him losing interest in me for someone else while he is out there. While I know this is highly illogical and somewhat possessive of me I can't seem to help myself with it. Just when we start to clear the air and move forward something like this pulls us apart. Aside from the great romance title, I'm less than thrilled about it, and I don't mind to show my disappointment to him.

"How long are you going to be gone for?" I ask "My guess is that you'll miss the project." I stand up having looked at the clock and seeing the time stamp on it, realizing I need to get to class.

"I'll be gone for two weeks and yes, I will miss the presentation of the project but as a makeup for that. I did my end of the work." He hands me a flash drive now "It's a powerpoint with all my research and the completed slides I had to do for it. I put in note cards and additional pointers that can be touched on when you present it." I fiddle with the flash drive between my fingers "All you have to do is your end. And I'll be free on facetime or skype if you need to talk with me about some things concerning the work." He gives me a warm smile as we begin to walk out of the library together.

"I appreciate that." I say as he holds the door open for me, allowing me entrance into the busy high school hallway without so much as a single flinch to be walking with me "Thought I was going to have to foot the bill on that."

"Nah." He gives a smirk and waves to some of his friends "I wouldn't put you in that position. Plus it reflects poorly on me if I were to leave you with that. I may be absent against my will but I'll do my best to remain present with you as best I can." A smile comes across my face as we head up the stairs "Your probably one of the most chill girls I've known. Thoughtful, caring. Makes me more inclined to care as well."

I blush as he says this. His first compliments of me, I may as well be swooned to the moon by it. I try to play it cool, but I can't seem to keep my composure, for as we approach my classroom I pull him aside to the lockers, the two of us standing some foot away from each other as I look up to his wide eyes and soft smile. I want to profess my affection for him, but I don't want to scare him off. These last couple minutes with him have made up for all the turmoil we'd gone through the last couple weeks, and I want to make the best of it while I can.

"I really appreciate everything you've done for me." I tell him in a moment of passion "I don't think I've met someone as amazing as you in all my years of coming to this school."

"I'm honored to hold the title." He brushes his shoulders in some poorly conceived bit that all but makes me laugh at his crazy antics more so then I would have imagined. "I'm glad to have someone as motivated as you who, although you may not know it, keeping me on my toes with all this."

"I'm glad I can subtly provide you with that extra push." I pride myself as the warning bell rings "I guess I'll see you in class later today?" I say ready to part ways but am stopped by the soft grasp of his hand tracing down my arm to take my hand. I can tell he is nervous, I am too, but I swallow my fear and look to him with open eyes. Whatever he is about to say to me, I know it's going to be good. I brace for the question I've been waiting for.

"I don't know what it is about you." He shakes his head blushing "It makes me want you more." He swallows hard as he pulls me in close to him, giving me a hug "I'll miss you when I'm gone. More then you'd think."

"I'll miss you too." I bury my face into his toned chest before we let go of each other and head off to our respective classes, a smile coming to my face as I replay those events through my head, not wanting to let them go for the life of me yet having to turn on my focus for school before class begins.

I've never been so happy before in my life. Maybe second to winning that hard-fought chess tournament but this, this is something different. This is real affection who by in my eyes, the hottest guy in our school is giving me. He may not be perfect. Maybe not hugging puppies or walking around with his shirt off doing hulk like things to dampen the panties of every girl in school, but he sure as hell has a place in my heart, and for that, I am more than grateful now I took those first steps to introduce myself to him. This weird sensation radiating through my body every time I think about him being one I'd never felt before. Something that was lost with Robbie and never seemed to come with someone else. I'm more than thrilled to have this feeling inside me, and I'm grateful its come to my life.

Through the remainder of my morning classes, I shine like a glowing lamp. I would have never imagined myself being this happy in school. Really even enjoying the time I would spend here. I have always liked my studies but to be in such a great mood seems to be something of an anomaly for me. It's kind of weird, this whole falling for someone type thing, and I would have never imagined I would experience it so soon in my life. I predicted around my twenties, in college or something I would branch out and find someone I could be with, but to be here now feeling this way, it scares me just as much as it excites me. I do my best to work with it though, using it for good instead of bad.

At lunch, I meet up with Ava. She has been one of my closest friends and trusted confidants throughout my days of middle school and high school. We met in having a class together. The teacher was this awful, mean guy who was very hard on us for no reason at all. Ava was the one who always stood up for her and I, making sure that we left that year with a good grade having fought hard and put in the work. Ever since then we've stuck together. Of course, as time passed these times faded and we found ourselves lost within the chaos of our own lives but every so often with decide to meet up, this time per my request as I feel this weird need to tell someone else about Vince.

Taking a seat outside, we manage to escape the loud booms of the lunchroom and make it to the track and field, where we post ourselves up on the bleachers. I have always been jealous of Ava's beauty, and through the last couple years of high school, she's really blossomed into a beautiful woman. Her deep blue eyes and dirty blonde hair cut shirt now in to about her shoulders has made me envious of her beauty. She has this incredible smile that every boy loves, and the figure of a goddess, so sleek and slim yet not boney. How she has it I have no idea. All around she is probably one of the most perfect people I have ever met. Minus a few flaws.

"It's good to see you." I open up as we take a seat on the bleachers overlooking the track.

"The feeling is always mutual Alex."

"How's school been?" I ask knowing we no longer share the same classes.

"Honours is hard." He laughs "I don't know how you do those AP classes cause I'm up to my eyeballs in work."

"It's all I do." We share a smirk together "Like seriously, its all I really do anymore."

"What a shame." She bites into her salad "I admire it but you have to live a little." She lightly punches my shoulder "Been telling you that for years now honey."

"Lot easier said than done." I shake my head "It's a lifestyle choice."

"But the band misses you." The girl fake cries "Colleen and Sabrina hasn't been the same since you left."

"Stop!" I hold her limp body falling on me "I saw you guys play two months ago you were incredible."

"Why thank you." She fixes herself proper like "All kidding aside we did work hard on those pieces. Gabby really fought hard for those solo pieces. We're all proud of how far she's come since freshman year."

"Think I saw her after the show. She did do an amazing job."

"By far and away." Ava smiles at me "it meant the world to her. You're like a legend amongst us."

"Oh stop it." I blush "You flatter me too much."

"You and only you." She bites into her salad "Aside from school how have things been?" We both look out to the track team doing warm-ups for their early afternoon practice.

"Pretty good." I nod "Haley's back home so that's been a ride." The girl compassionately listens to me "I met a guy the other week." We both crack into a smile "He's amazing."

"Oh my god, I heard about that!" Ava puts her salad down "Stacy was telling me how you two were working together on this project or something." I look to her in shock that she'd already heard, knowing she's never been one of gossip throughout my time knowing her "It was very vague but I did hear about it."

"I'm surprised you heard about it." I dart my vision away. "Especially from Stacy. That doesn't seem right."

"You know how Stacy is with her big mouth and wild ideas. I just think she was happy for you if anything. Vince is one of the hottest guys in our grade and for you to be so close with him now is awesome for you."

"Insinuating that I'm undeserving of him?" I ask with a Schoff "Based on what criteria?"

"Don't be putting words in my mouth." The girl puts her wrists up in ceasefire "Usually guys like him go for idiotic cheer girls or off the reservation hippie chicks rolling face all day. Not smart ones like us."

"He's got a different side to him." I try to stick up for the teen as best I can "He's not like most guys who party and act like douche bags because they think girls like it. He paves his own path. He's really smart and funny. So polite and gentlemanly. He is way beyond his years in maturity if you ask me."

"Got to watch out for the charmers though." Ava leans down almost to a whisper "I'll tell you this because I think you should know, that someone's told me Vince has an arrest record." I swallow hard in shock "Someone told me back in Wisconson there was like a year where he was arrested multiple times for fighting and drug possession. They even said he was in a Milwaukee gang at some point. Like, an actual gang."

"So what?" I ask sitting up "There's been no indication of any of that from the time I've spent with him. Not a single bit of it. Even if he was the past is the past. It doesn't define who we are moving forward. Seems like he's cleaned up his act pretty well. In AP classes and always showing up for things."

"I'm not saying he's a bad person. I'm just saying you should watch out for him." I lean back in disgust now, completely discrediting whatever Ava is telling me as nothing but school girl gossip "People change, but those records, they are serious crimes, and people who have spent time in jail are more likely to spend more time in jail. Serial killers can go for months if not years without killing and then flip on a dime. All it takes is one thing to set them off and you could be looking at some Bonnie Clyde type thing going on there."

"There is no evidence to support any of this." I sit up now angry about it "While I respect you telling me about it I have yet to see one shred of evidence in the many times that I've hung out with him that he's ever been arrested or been to jail or is this druggie criminal that people say he is."

"I'm not attacking you, Alex-"

"But you're attacking him. Without knowing anything about him. Without having talked to him once or even cared to get to know him. Whoever said that is lying, and until I see evidence to support it, I'm not going to abandon someone that I like and is a good person based on some false high school rumor."

To say I am pissed over this would be an understatement. I am more upset that Ava would say these things to me instead of supporting me and wanting me to be happy with someone who I think it a really good guy. She's never been one for gossip, but now it seems like she's found that life. I can't hate her for it, but I sure as hell can combat the things she says to me. In all truth and logic, I know there is a lot I don't know about Vince. He is a private person and he keeps to himself about most things, but to brand him like that is just horrible, and I wouldn't want it done to me, my family, my friends, or even those to whom I do not like. Even Robbie. I was raised under the belief that it is wrong to spread rumors about people, and while most everyone doesn't follow that, I stick by it fully.

"Alex." I can hear her voice in plead of me not to be mad anymore "I'm just trying to help you out."

"By slandering his name and telling me false things." She tries to interject but I cut her off "I appreciate you telling me that, and I will do my own research on it. I don't see it in him, and I do not think it's true. Just because he is a quiet guy and looks like he's been through some things doesn't mean that he is a bad person." I continue on "I never once heard you say anything bad about Robbie even though you knew he was smoking weed and stealing things from stores.. Where were you then to look out for me?" I call her on her clearly bullshit tactic "Where were you in the band when Lucy was trying to get me to lie about her absences from school and forge doctors notes? You knew about that and didn't tell me, almost got me in trouble for it as well."

"Alex I-"

"No." I cut her off for the last time "You can sit there all you want and tell me you're doing this for my best interest but in reality, it seems like there's something else you want to tell me."

The two of us start off at one another. I know she knows what I mean. While I may not be that acquainted with the culture of high school I do listen to what people say, and I am not blind to the reality of what's going on. In almost every case, when mean girls want a guy they will slander him to the girl who likes him. Thus creating a divide amongst them and drawing the man into their arms. While I would hope in a million years that Ava wouldn't do this to me, I wouldn't put it beside her now to sneak something in there like this playing on my emotions and connections to her. I sit and wait for her response, my question anything but rhetorical as she begins to break her glance.

"If you're insinuating that I am going behind your back to try and get him then your wrong." Ava says "I would never do that to you. Never in a million years would I betray you like that." I take her claims with a grain of salt "He is good looking, and while I do envy you slightly for it I would never do that to you. Ever."

"I don't know Eva sure seems like you are," I comment to her disgust.

"Never." She says shocked and hurt "How could you think I would do that to you?"

"You're smart. Look at the facts. Never before have you looked out for my best interest with a guy. Never. Now all of a sudden you come out of the woodwork trying to play the concerned friend off some here say from someone like Stacy, who I know is not one to gossip about things like that? No." I say holding my ground "Just take a step back and look that this from my point of view. If I were doing this to you."

"I don't know Alex." She collects her things in a hurry "I'm sorry for trying to help you not ruin your life but screw me if I genuinely care about you and your well being." She stands up "Because if push came to shove, I know you would do the exact same thing for me. At least I'd hope so."

Her arguments run through my head as she collects her things and storms off. Maybe I was a bit of a bitch to her in some respects, but I was only looking out for Vince and his well being. I couldn't have her sway me to believe something that I don't know is true. I am a very logical person and while I do have a bias towards him, if something like that were to come up I would have to address it and make sure it was not the case if I did decide to pursue him in a romantic means. All of this goes through my head as I finish eating my food. Trying to connect all these obscure dots coming out of nowhere to paint the true picture of what is really going on.


	6. Chapter 6

Forbidden Lust: Wet Dream

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

A loud noise startles me from my slumber. I quickly look at the clock, reading two-thirty in the morning. No one should be up this late, even Haley who gets back from work around three or four in the morning now. I am slightly confused as to this, somewhat scared as well. My heart begins to race as I look towards my door. I do not hear anything but your mind begins to play tricks on you. A light shuffle here or a pin drop there. I grasp my covers as I lay back down, trying as hard as I can to ignore the spooky sounds and fall back to sleep. I have to be up for school in a couple hours, I need to get my rest aimed two tests and more drama to deal with.

Just as I close my eyes once more what sounds like a rock shoots me straight up. My breathing ragged, I walk swing my legs over the side of my bed and walk to the spot of the sound. It's in the far window of my bedroom, the one by my closet as opposed to over my desk. It could be the tree having overgrown and hitting the side of the house from the wind, but I'm not so open to that idea as the room goes silent again. Had it been wind it would have scraped, not shot, furthering my concerns that there is something fishy going on that I can't yet see.

Inching closer and closer towards the window, another light bang scares me back. My body telling me to run and see what it is yet my mind closing in on the idea that I should run, screaming to my dad so he can solve this mystery. I am now three inches from the window, enough for me to look outside it with the utmost secrecy. If there is an attacker there, I don't want them to see me looking out. Having an advantage is my best bet for right now, and losing that could spell disaster for not only me but the whole family as well.

Peering into the darkness, there is nothing that catches my attention over something else. The yard is pitch black, the grass covered in dew and branches blowing in the wind yet coming nowhere close to scraping the side of the building as I'd hoped they would be. This figure in the lawn stands completely still. I have to assume it is a human being because there's nothing else it could be. My mind races as I try to decipher it, trying my best to remain calm as I watch it move back and turn to face the window. I duck slightly so it can't see me but still so I am able to track their movements. I try and grab for my phone but I would have to move if that were the case. Any sudden movements could alert them to my presence and thus create a catastrophe. I continue to watch and wait for their next move.

For almost a minute they stand there, almost impatiently as they look around the yard. They war a black hoodie and black jeans, black shoes and cover most of their skin with the outfit. It's not cold outside, in fact, it may be misty but it's pretty warm, maybe around seventy degrees or so. The utter frustration of this matter seeming to drive them insane, for as they pull down the hood they wear I stand up in disbelief of who it is. I should have known that the only person why would be romantic enough and or even come across the idea of a passionate arrival to my house would be Vince. I do see it as being somewhat creepy but more telling than anything else.

Now my heart is beating for a different reason. I slowly unlock the window and open it, his head turning up to find me on its cusp. For a second we make eye contact, his eyes are wide with excitement, a smile coming across his face as he steps closer to the window as not to yell. Slumping his hands into his pockets he looks around the yard for a second. I can see his hair is pretty messed up from the hood but in a sexy kind of way.

"Mind if I come in?" He asks me in a soft voice.

I debate my options. If my parents were to find out I would be killed, but the pleasure I know I will be receiving from him completely surmount to anything I would even come close to experiencing in terms of punishment for my mom or dad. I nod to him as his smile widens "Backdoor. The sliding one." I point around the house as he gives me a thumbs up. I have to hurry become someone could possibly see him. The last thing I want is to get snubbed or even worse the police called on him, that would only further Ava's attacks against him.

Opening my door, I lightly run to the stairs where I tip tow down as soft as I can. Thank god my dad redid them a couple months ago. There are no creeks or cracks to be had on them, instead just the sound of my soft feet lightly bouncing down each one. When I reach the bottom of the stairs I do what I can to fix myself in route to the back door. I am a mess, most likely, but at this moment I could care less, and I know that Vince would probably care less too. He himself looks as disheveled and beat as I do, giving me a little confidence he will not judge me.

Approaching the back door I slowly unlock it and slide it open. Thank god there is no alarm on the door, as that would have soiled my plans from the beginning. Once he is in I close the door and leave it slightly ajar. I want to give him the chance of escape if he were to need one, as my own selfish needs do not trump his well being, and in the midst of our affection to one another I could find myself getting so wrapped up in the fling of it all my mind would stop functioning at Alex level, leaving me in a rather dumbfounded state of mind.

"What are you doing here?" I ask with a smile as he pulls down his hood and stands by the couch.

"I wanted to see you." He says to me as I cross my legs and bite my pointed finger. "I couldn't wait."

"It's only a couple more hours." I smile as he starts walking to me, his much taller, much more muscular body approaching me faster then I would have imagined, my thought trailing off before I can even speak it as he stops some two inches from me, his breath smelling of clean mint and body smelling of cologne.

"That wouldn't be good enough for me." A million thoughts race through my head as the man lightly traces his finger from my shoulder all the way down to take my hand "I thought about you far too long while I was gone." He follows suit with my other hand "There's no one else I've met that makes me feel as amazing as you do."

I don't know what to say. I want to blush, smile, jump for joy, cry, scream. All of these emotions coming to head as the teen takes both my hands and slowly raises them to his lips, kissing them with a deep smile across his face, I give him one back, my face flushes hot with nerves as my body begins to tingle.

"Life hasn't dealt me a good hand these last couple years." He trails off, breaking eye contact "I can't do anything about the things I've done and the places I've been. But ever since I met you that first time, the look in your eyes passing through the hall, I knew my life was about to change forever." He smirks pulling me in close, my body now pressed against his in no protest of mine "I may not be too good at this romance stuff, but that'no indication of the way I feel about you Alex. I may not be able to swoon your or talk you into my arms, but I do care about you."

"I never doubted it for a second." I press myself against him, pulling his hips close to me "Why don't you show me just how much you care for me, Mr. Vince." I bite my lower lip in anticipation as a broad smile comes over him.

"You'd like that huh." His warm breath sends chills down my spine as he closes in on right nook of my neck, teasing me with the feeling of his soft lips before kissing me passionately, sighting a deep moan of approval from my plush lips, my body starting to beg me for release as I feel my panties grow more moist with every passing second.

"Oh my god yes." I smile as I kiss his cheek in approval, taking his head in my hand as I lift him up and we kiss each other's lips in deep passion. I've never kissed a guy before, and I have to say the feeling is amazing. The soft touch of his lips upon mine is a feeling I can't seem to describe other than pure perfection. As our bodies touch, I can feel his hands tracing up and down the side of my body. I am nervous, but I don't let him know. I want this to go the distance, show a little bit of experience to my lover and not be outed as a virgin to him. I try my best to let him take the lead as we kiss for a while longer, my entire body blissfully floating in joy before he stops.

"Do you want this" He asks me before I back up to the couch amidst the dimly lit room, continuing to back up around the left side of the couch standing directly in my living room, unzipping his sweatshirt slowly with a devilish smile before his face "I don't want to course you into something you may not want." He raises and eyebrow.

"I want it." I slowly walk towards his muscular body as he tosses the sweatshirt onto the chair "I want it so bad."

Approaching him, I take the bottom of his t-shirt in my hand, pulling him close to me as we kiss on the lips. I want him undressed as fast as I can. It's like some kind of animals taken over me, something I would have never come to imagine driving me to do things I would never think I'd do. I try to remain quiet as I help him take off his shirt. His muscles so tones and defined I can't help but run my fingers over the toned ridges of his abs and chest, just the sight of which is making me wet enough let alone the soft strokes of my fingers down south to this member might as well give me an orgasm before I lose a single bit of clothes. I have to control myself.

As I finish tracing my fingers over his chest and abs I feel him take either end of my shirt and pull it over my head. The cold chill of the house stunning me to reality for a second, making me second guess what I am doing here. But those thoughts are quickly shattered by the warm touch of his rough hands tracing up my soft skin. My shirt joining his he kisses me on the lips as he places a hand on the clasp of my bra. We exchange a look of passion before I nod, no sense in speaking as we go right back to kissing one another, the cold air grasping my nipples with fury as my bra drops to the floor. Looking up I can see his eyes go wide as he stares before my large chest. I smile in knowing his approval and take his hand to guide his touch along them, a moan of pleasure from the both of us as he lets me take control.

In letting him play with me for a minute I trace my fingers down his washboard abs to the front of his pants, where I slowly unbutton his jeans and slowly pull them down. I crush before his crotch as he quickly stands me back up, a look of confusion coming across my face as he gives me a shrug.

"A woman I care of shall always be pleased before me." He gives me a goofy wink "Nonnegotiable."

I don't bother a protest to this as he ensures to kiss from the base of my breasts down the slender figure of my stomach to the cusp of my pants, he waited no more then a second before taking the end of them and slowly pulling them down, grasping my panties in the handful as he revealed my sleekly shaven core, his eyes glistening with ecstasy as he traces his hands over my ass and gripped the back of my thighs, kissing just inches above my screaming core to my moans of pleasure. I want him to go for it all, but I don't say a word, my mind to scattered for such words.

In what I would have to guess is some kind of tease the teen kisses up and down my inner thigh with a sadistic look on his face as if he were to somehow know my torture and playing into this weird game of wait with me as if he were to enjoy this tease of me. I can't deny it isn't turning me on even more, but i worry about being caught. My urge to release my tension in moan has been growing steadily, and as he backs me up to the couch I cover my mouth in anticipation of what's to come next, not knowing what will happen beyond this moment.

"Close your eyes." He tells me in a deep raspy voice "Let me do all the work."

I follow orders, a smile on my face as I lean back to the support of the pillows as I feel the teen's breath teasing between my legs. I'm so nervous I may as well jump out of my seat. I've never had anything like this done before, my expectations extremely high from what I've seen in porn films yet my reality check coming sooner then I would have thought as a loud thud comes from upstairs, so loud, in fact, it causes me to open my eyes, those full of panic and dismay as I look around the room. Ragged breathing matched with dripping sweat, I collect myself in bed to find it was nearly a dream. A real one, however, for as I lift my covers I find my sheets completely soaked through.


	7. Chapter 7

Forbidden Lust: Conflicting Stories

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

 _This day's been driving me crazy. Couped up here with nothing to do, I may as well just surrender myself to the mercy of my parents and stay here. They don't want me going back to California, but there is a lot more for me there than there ever will be here. They can't seem to let go of the past, everything they do just a constant reminder of that night, a constant reliving of the worst thing that's happened to me. Isolation is the whole way I know how to solve it, sit back in my room, relax, and call my friends. They always seem to take my mind off things, even if it's through some unconventional means. How I wish I could call Alex, submerge myself in the true happiness I have with her. It seems I'm at a crossroads though, my mind constantly preoccupied with the worry that she will find out... that she would never give me the time of day having discovered the secrets of my past..._

I wake up to a chilly morning in California, my mind racing as I'm late for school once again. I never would have thought how much a little drama could go such a long way in defeating a person. It seems I have become all consumed by it, this nagging little voice in my head never allowing me to shut down and get some rest. It is always there, always squawking the things those have said and not said about Vince and I. It's beginning to break me down, and I am starting to worry I will have to remove myself from this all together in light of such reprisals.

I walk through the halls this morning knowing full well that most people know about me now. Going from someone just a couple months ago who wasn't even known by some people in my class to having people stare at me inconspicuously in the wake of these disclosures gives me an eerie feeling. I walk through the halls much faster now and never linger. I don't have many people in my life anymore who support me, at least at school I should say. They have either taken my side or the side of Ava, who has continued to persecute me amidst my pleads of her to stop.

Since our meeting, things have only gone south for me. Though I hadn't seen Ava in a long time I was sure that her scope of influence would not reach through the outer edges of her friend circle. She had always been a quiet and reserved person, someone uncontrolled by the way of drama and turncoats that many high school kids are. I guess you could say I underestimated her. Within a week of us talking, it seemed like everyone knew. My guess is that she ranted and raved to someone who then passed the message through her friend group until it got to someone outside the circle, then there would be no controlling it. I worry about what she's said and it took me a while before one of my closest friends, a girl named Alicia, decided to tell me what it was.

According to Alicia, Ava went on saying that Vince, who she claims is a drug-addicted criminal, is now somehow a womanizer and domestic abuser. She also mentioned that he got into some hot water in Madison some years back when he allegedly raped a girl, which is why in addition to the death of his sister he moved here to California for a fresh start. Alicia also told me that Ava has gone on saying that because I do not denounce him for what he's done, I am somehow just as bad as he is, even though I do not take the claims at face value nor do I even know the full story. It makes me somewhat sick thinking about it, for that accusation carries great weight, and it's ultimately been what's sunk me in the last week and continuing on into this week, even with a four-day break in between.

Alicia stuck by my side until Monday this week, until the criticism she received become too much. I got a text message from her last night filled with emotion and guilt about how she could no longer stick by my side with it on the count that her friends were starting to leave her because of it. The game of politics having sucked her in and turned her to the other side before I even had a chance to respond to her. Now I am alone. It's the middle of the week and I don't know how in the hell I am going to get through these last two days at school. I then have another ten days before Christmas break, those probably proving to be the hardest of them all.

Aside from my wet dream about a night with Vince I have barely had time to think about him. I think about him, per say, but not in the way of sexual proclivity and lovey-dovey things. Instead, it is how I am going to approach this when he does come back. I already feel bad about him having to open up to me about his sister's death given we haven't gone on one actual date yet, now I'm going to have to press him on his past? I do not doubt he will be honest with me, but that scares me just as much as the fact that he might lie to me. In all reality, I do not know what he's going to do when I say it, but all I know is I hope this all blows over soon. I'm getting tired of running to classes and hiding from people.

I always manage to make it through my first four classes with ease, but after that, it becomes hard for me to continue on through the day given I have to deal with Stacy and two other girls in my last classes who seem to chastise me at any chance they get. It's not bullying, though, it's more of food for thought I'd rather not hear. I sit next to them in each one, and they never fail to ask me about the latest drama surrounding my name. Usually, I do not respond, or I tell them that I'm not focusing on the issue right now, but the last couple fo days I've been feeling snappy. Something about going into this week that's made me angrier than usual with them, and I have been hitting back.

I am not mean about it, I'm never mean about it. I usually just question them on the veracity of their claims, to which it always ends in he told me that she said that she said that he said case. The line of communication enough to make anyone's head spin about how many people they heard it from. What I have concluded is that there is no single source where this is coming from. Its as if people are pulling this stuff out of thin air, not caring in the slightest if it is true or not. Popular kids can make up anything and people will always believe them for some reason, and it's people like me who end up suffering as a result of that garbage. I go into the fifth period with this in mind. I keep my head high and do not show any signs of weakness. Haley told me that this weekend when we crossed paths.

In the last couple weeks, Haley's work has been so busy she barely has time for anything anymore, and I do not want to bother her with my petty high school drama bullshit. We crossed paths this weekend and I briefly mentioned something to her, very vague in my description. She told me that if I keep my head high and don't let anyone know that the drama is getting to me, that I will be a lot better off then if I show weakness and cower at their attacks. I took her advice to heart, and while I do manage to escape the torrent of the halls I keep my head high when it comes to one on one. I am much better in those cases then defending myself against a gang of people. I really want to talk to Haley about this though, and I am growing worried about my ability to continue on until the break comes my way.

Entering my fifth-period class I am greeted by Stacy, who gives me a nasty look as soon as I walk in. I still have yet to figure out why it is she is the one whos been the main perpetrator of these attacks against me. He role seems lost upon me, and I'm struggling with trying to decipher what it is she is trying to hold a position on here. Her main arguments against me seem to be that I am harboring a womanizer, stating that because I refuse to denounce the teen for what he's done in his past and the way in which he supposedly treated girls he's dated, that I am somehow this evil person who is allowing him to continue on oppressing the women and girls he comes into contact with. For the last couple of days, it's all I've been hearing from her, and I expect no different today.

I take my seat next to her and pull out my notebook and pen. Best thing I can do now would be to ignore her and hope she's to busy with something else to call me out. Through the soft music of my headphones, I can hear he whispering to people around her, giggling as they look at me. I know she wants to get a rise out of me, but I refuse to submit to her childish games. Her point to me has been made clear, and it seems as though no matter what I say to her she is going to continue on with it. Her siding with Ava becoming so apparent it almost cringes me. I am grateful for the start of class because I know things will quiet down, but when I hear that we will be spending our last day before projects working on them, I quickly grow more worried. An entire class period of having to deal with her is not on my list of higher activities I would like to engage in, especially given Vince and I's work is done.

Once we are dismissed to work I ask the teacher to go study in the commons, where at least I'll be able to find some peace and quiet. He agrees with me and allows me to head there. I rush my ass over, avoiding any confrontation and find a seat in the back, where I hope to god I will be able to clear my head a little.

A lot of time's it's not what people say to you, it's what they don't say that tortures you so much. Knowing you are the subject of someone's rumors is never good, especially when they are false. I get this feeling like I'm drowning. No matter how hard I kick up to breath some air I am always pulled back down at the last second, thus never allowing me to surface and bring my arguments to the table. Fighting it alone has only made it worse in a lot of ways, for I am unable to protect myself and my well being against those who will attack me for no reason. I'm starting to realize I'll need some help. Coming from where, however, is the ultimate question?

I start to think of who it is I can trust with this. There is really no one in the school I can go to that won't get turned by Ava and her crew. My mom would only provide me some kind of old ass advice and my dad wouldn't do much for me given he's probably never been in such a predicament. Haley is to busy with work to worry about my needs and Luke is far to young to give me any kind of help. It leaves my options slim. Vince could and probably stick up with me, god frobid the firestom he will face when he returns, I would hate to bother him on his trip and make it far more stressfull then it already is. I start thinking harder as mroe people take seats around me, I can feel them staring at me from a far, not making comment but just looking, as if they were to be examining a wild animal.

I catch the attention of a girl sittingwith her friends. She quickly turns her attention away from me. Another boy stares at me from his computer, the two of us holding eachothers gaze for a few seconds before he rolls his eyes and goes back to work. I continue to think for a minute before catching the attention of a man standing against a floor to ceiling book shelf occupied by textbooks. His leans against the frame of it, glaring at me from a distance before bouncing back to his book. Then it hits me, the guy I met at the arcade. I can remeber him messaging me once or twice. We talked for a little bit, but it didnt seem to go anywhere.

I'd completley frogot about him until right then. Pulling out my phone, I send him a message urgetly, briefly explaining that I need to talk with someone and asking him if he could somehow meet up with me today. He gets back to me within ten minutes telling me he will be free for the next hour or so but after that he has work. I debate skipping my classes, for i've never been one to skip school or even one class for a good reason. Yet I know my mental health is far more important then my academic standing as of now, and I agree to meet him at a small diner some half mile away from the school as soon as I can. We agree on the time and I head out, able to slip through the west enterence of the school and head to the diner where I will hopfully meet him within the hour.

My heart races as the clock ticks down. I shouldnt be nervous, but I find myself growing more and more anxious as the clock ticks down to zero. Outside the diner, I walk in and grab a seat. I dont see him anywhere so I shoot him a message. Before he can respond, however, I watch him enter the door. He looks very laid back, wearing a pair of green golf shorts with a collard polo tucked in with a black belt and nike running shoes. His hair is shorter then I remeber, almost by an inch. I wave to him and he walks over to me, taking a seat at the booth. I hope he didnt dress up like this for me, but as soon as he starts talking I can tell he is here as a friend more so anything else. It puts me a lot more at ease, allowing me to relax myself and move foward with our talk.

"Sorry I was late." He politley excuses himself and grabs a menu "Got caught up in school for a second."

"No worries." I give him a warm smile "Kinda sprung this on you real quick."

"Yeah." He places the menu down "Didnt expect to hear from you again but i'm glad you reached out." His voice is deeply toned but oddly relaxed. "Take it things aren't going to well for you?"

"No." I shake my head "How do you know?"

"Took a shot in the dark." He shrugs "You just look like you have a million things on your mind. My older sister gets the same look sometimes when drama or some shit's going on with her." I put the menu down and fiddle with a small packet of salt and pepper trying to think of how I can word my issues to him.

"There aren't many people I can talk to in school." I hang my head down "Shits been going down and I don't know what to do or how to handle it or pretty much anything about any of that."

After the waitress comes and takes our order I explain to him the situation. Having thought that he would shoot me down as soon as he found out it was about a boy I liked, I was pleasantly surprised how nice and caring he was about the whole thing. Throughout my five straight minutes of rambling and bouncing back and forth he never once broke eye contact, maintaining this level of attention I didn't expect from him or anyone else. I can't even begin to express how good it feels to let it all out of me. The stress, the worry, the anxiety all just pouring from my being in this long, rapid trail of words just seem to just flow out from me disregarding any sense of judgment or backlash.

"I just don't know what to do with it all." I conclude "With Vince or Ava, even Stacy yet alone everyone else whop seems to think I'm some kind of monster for something I haven't even done."

"Well." He starts off sipping a glass of water "First off I'm very sorry for having to hear you've been going through that. No one deserves it. Kids our age can be horribly mean sometimes when they see a possible weakness in someone they can exploit for their own personal gains. Its a dog eat dog world out there."

"I can only handle to attacks for so long before something has to be done."

"Lot of times once someone has made up their mind its hard for them to change it. Especially with the culture of our society now where there seems to be this set list of right and wrong that each group pushes. You can be right on one side and wrong on the other. People are so quick to demonize without looking into themselves. Majority of them, most likely, are hypocrites to start off with. Get behind the attacking of Vince yet have turned blind eyes to other instances their whole life. Way I see it they're trying to get a rise out of you."

"Its been working." I roll my eyes in annoyance "I just want them to shut up about it."

"That might be hard to do." The man places his glass down and eats a fry "Best way you can in my eyes is provide them with the facts behind these allegations." The teen explains "In my school, there was a kid who got accused of sexually assaulting a girl in the bathroom of prom. She claimed that he came up behind her and pushed her down, raped her in less then fifteen seconds then ran off. Absolute terrible thing to happen or do." I listen close. "It took the police and school officials almost three months before they figured out she'd seduced him outside the bathroom. They were even seen leaving together kissing after almost three minutes time."

"What happened to him?" I ask as the man leans back, looking off to the distance for a second.

"He still lives here. Sits next to me in my Rhetoric class. Absolutely amazing kid, very smart and bright. Still thought the effects of those allegations ruined him socially. He has no friends anymore, doesn't get invited anywhere. A statement was released by the girl claiming she lied and still no one wants to be seen with him. Tried to kill himself about a month ago. His life will never be the same after that story broke. Never."

"That's awful." I hang my head down in sorrow, my heart feeling for the victim of such a ruthless accusation.

"You probably won't be able to get people to stop, but you can do your research on it. If he has done the things these people claim he has, they will be online somewhere. Every arrest is documented, and there are sites you can look up that will give you information on what it is he has or has not done."

"I'm scared to look though." I tell the man quietly "What if I don't like what I see?"

"You might not, but that's the risk you run in discovering the truth about it. Chances are whoever got this rumor heard it by word of mouth. Its easy to slander someone by word of mouth but rarely is someone falsely slandered with the presentation of the correct facts. That will be the make or break of this."

"I just.." I try to think of what I am going to say "I want things to work out between us. He is a good guy and he's an amazing person at heart. He look tough and rough but he would never hurt a fly." I swallow hard, the pressure of all this starting to get to me as I feel a lump growing in my throat "He's the first guy I've known whose ever been there for me the way he has and if it turns out he really did those things it would crush me."

"You don't know he'd done them for sure." The teen smiles admits the tears running down my cheeks "If he has then that might change things but for now he is as innocent as anyone can be."

"I can't do it though." I sniffle, face flushing red with embarrassment "I can't bare to know the truth."

Sighing, the man finishes his last fry before leaning in close to me, my head buried in my hands to prevent him from watching me sob before him "The truth about a past does not have to define who someone will become in the future." He explains "You said it yourself. Even if he did those things people are capable of change, and I am sure that his intentions at that time were not because he was an evil person or because he overtly wanted to cause harm upon someone else, but instead a wrong place wrong time type scenario. No matter what the variables might be."

I try to take a breath and calm down so I can respond, however in a state of overwhelmed grief and strife within the moral couscous of myself I find it hard to even stop myself from crying given a coming to terms of the reality in this situation. This is not without fault though, for while I do like what the teen has to say his conformation that I must seek out the truth on this matter has somehow proved far to much for me to handle. While I would like to admit that Vince was not a bad person in his past life the more I think about it the more I start to get this feeling like those around me might be right, and I will be forced to figure out this incredibly hard decision.

It takes me a minute before I am able to calm down and collect myself. Noah, the kid sitting before me with this calming look upon his face is all I have now to keep me sane I feel, and I am going to do all I can to get his help around the so long as I can. After I am able to stop crying over this my logic starts to come back, and I realize that since he is from a different school he is the perfect person for me to entrust with this. As someone who was so weary at first, I am glad that I can come forth and entrust someone else with these concerns.

For some time we sit and talk about other things. I think he recognized the extreme amount of stress I was under and decided to lighten things up, telling me about where he worked and some funny stories around it, prompted a couple of funny stories of my own that really helped me to get out of my head for a second and not focus on the whole situation. It really made me feel good to be there with him, and for a second I thought about ditching Vince for him, just removing myself completely from that horror and instead b offering with Noah.

Before he left, still aimed these thoughts running through my head, he told me he would look into Vince for me, saying that not only was it for his own intrigue but because he didn't want me to worry about it. I told him Vince would be returning in a little less than ten days. We agreed to meet up again if I wanted to hear the news about it, my mind returning once again back to my moral conflict as I walk home, still unsure of knowing the truth.


	8. Chapter 8

Forbidden Lust: Vince's Return

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

I sit in quiet wait, counting down the seconds until I can leave the school. I have a lot on my mind since Vince messaged me and told me he's returned to California. There are just so many things I need to tell him. These last couple days have been great, leading me no problems in terms of bullying or harassment at the hands of those around me, for it seems as though everyone has forgotten and moved onto something else. Of course Ava still gives me nasty look and Stacy doesn't talk to me, but for the most part, I have been enjoying the reprieve aimed Vince's return.

I do worry about what will happen when he comes back. My mind filled with anxiety as to what I am going to do when he does return and I am seen with him. It will be a nightmare. I can handle myself with the help of Noah and now Haley who had a long talk with me the other night about things, but for Vince, I am really worried about how he is going to handle all this stress and pressure. I'm sure in his long life he has experienced much more pain and suffering than a couple schoolyard bullies, but still, my heart goes out to him, and I worry about his well being.

The message he sent me came in about an hour ago, telling me he had landed and wanted to meet up with me after school. He told me he wouldn't be coming since there would be no point, which I get. We agreed to meet up at a park some half a mile from the school, him even agreeing to pick me up from the airport in his father's car. I told him this was not necessary and that I would meet him there instead, choosing to clear my mind before I met him.

Once class ended I started my walk to the park, where I would end up meeting Vince not too long from now. My heart began to race as the accumulation of the last two weeks pushed itself into my mind. I still have yet to know if the allegations against Vince are true or not, continuing to hold onto some hope that they are false so we can dispel the rumors and move on with our lives. In my dreams, it ends immediately, with an apology and the immediate stop the harassment of myself and those who stand by me. People acting like people once again and doing away with this petty nonsense. It could be a reality had I simply asked for the information from Noah.

He's told me he found out about Vince for nearly a week now to no real applause by me. I told him that while I wanted to know them, it would feel wrong in my mind snooping behind Vince's back to try and get them. I feel like in doing such it would ruin our standing and bring forth a discussion of trust and the worth of it I would rather not fall into at the moment. With everything else going on in my life with school and the end of the year planning I am so conflicted on where to put my energy I find zero time to actually do much of anything on the issue. I've been letting it float by the wayside, that being what I believe to be the reason it has not been bothering me so much.

Entering the park, I find the setting to be serene and calm. While I would have expected there to be loads of people enjoying one of the warmer November days there seem to be very few people here. A couple walks their dog in the distance and a group of boys plays football in an open field. A small scatter of lemonade stands seem to pop up every tenth of a mile or so, vendors selling everything from lemonade to brownies and cookies in the hopes of sending the money to their desired political organization. Something I never get around to research anymore. I find a seat in the middle of the park and take a seat, turning off my music as I close my eyes in patient wait for Vince. My heart pounds hard as the seconds tick away. I anticipate him coming up to me at any second, and I frequently open my eyes thinking I hear him only to find a false alarm of a runner or someone cutting through the park.

It isn't until I open my eyes for the tenth time that I see him. Time to put on my game face. He walks to me from the left entrance of the park, wearing his usual jeans and t-shirt attire. He looks sexy, more build then the last time I saw him but then again it's been a couple weeks. I'm sure I've lost weight from the stress and anxiety eating away at me, there is a part of myself that hopes he makes a comment but I push aside all romance stuff and try to focus on the matter at hand. Do I ask him or do I not? There isn't anything I should be afraid of, yet I find myself jockeying back and forth as he takes a seat next to me, his warming smile enough to melt my heart as he takes a deep inhale and hold it, exhaling a shallow stream of breath as he slouches down in his seat, his gaze now fixated on me.

"Do my eyes deceive me or is that Alex Dunphy?" He smiles fixing his hair all nice.

"I'm an agent in disguise." I play along with the game "Sent here to kill you for leaking those secrets."

"Ugh." He throws his hands up "Have mercy on me for I did it not for myself but for the great people of my suffering country. The word must know of these authorities and they must know now."

"You broke the rules Agent Campbell." I shake my head "You must face the punishment you'll be given."

"If I die." He looks up to the sky with a corny smile "I die for my people."

"You'd make a good secret agent." I smile to the ground as he shakes his head.

"Only a secret agent. Can't seem to identify with any other role."

"I'm sure we could find a way to work that out." I give him a nudge as he smiles wide to me.

"I'll take your word for it." He nods looking over the passing cars and playing children before us. "Meant to message you a couple times but going back home for two weeks isn't what it seems."

"It's okay." I nod my head "No hard feelings."

"How have you been?"

"Good." I swallow hard with some hesitation to follow "Busy with school these last couple weeks. Caught up on all my work for those new classes so I'm in a pretty good spot come the beginning of next semester."

"How'd the project go?" He asks checking his phone.

"Got an 'A' on it." I smile to him "We did a good job on it."

"Teacher said he was going to dock me some five presentation points so that should land me with an 'A-' if I have my math right. Didn't get the grading rubric so I'm actually not so sure about it."

"I wouldn't worry about it." I try to put his mind at ease "It's more about the content then it is the actual presentation of the work. At least in this manner, it is, maybe not for public speaking."

"I dread the day I have to take that class." He shakes his head "Not the best with big groups of people."

"You'll survive. That's not until college anyways."

"Right you are."

A long silence fills the air. I can tell he is hiding something from me, but I am not sure what it is. I want to ask him about his trip but I do not want to bring up any undue stress upon him. I wonder now if he knows about the smears against him and he is waiting to see if I will bring them up. It doesn't lend me any bit of a helping hand to know there is really nothing I can do or say that will make it better. My performance in protecting him has been lackluster. I worry maybe that has got back to him, as for someone who seems to be a very loyal person it wouldn't be the end all be all of our little escapades as I know it. Giving me no shot at redemption only a burned bridge I couldn't rebuild.

"How was your trip?" I asked breaking the silence.

"It was good." He nods his head "All things aside I managed to see some of my old friends. Visited a couple family members while I was there. Did a lot of house cleaning. Took care of some things."

"I'm glad it wasn't all that stressful for you."

"Surprisingly it was not." He slouches down "Lot of old shit gets brought back up when I go there but I'm old enough now to where I can distinguish those times and move on from them. Always hard seeing old friends you sort of abandoned over the years having to go back and explain yourself to them."

"I can't imagine."

"I'm glad I'm out of it though." He shakes his head "I couldn't have made the strides I have today if I'd decided to stick back there and continue on with what I was doing. There's just no way."

"You've got people here." I tell him "Good people here to help you grow and advance."

"Should have utilized some of that a little more." He sits up "Heard some things I wasn't happy about."

"What do you mean?" My heart sinks, planning for the worst as he prepares to speak.

"Someone sent me a message on Instagram the other day just going into me on something." He speaks in slight confusion as if he legitimately didn't know why it was happening.

"Someone from my Calc class that I don't know that well tried ripping me for these charges they think I have. I don't know what it's about but they seemed pretty convinced in their attack of me. Worries me the whole school knows about it now."

"Is he right about it?" I ask silently like from the shadow of my bruised ego.

"That's what's so confusing about it. I was never arrested for assault or battery. Domestic violence or whatever he was trying to accuse me of. Granted I had some problems back in Wisconsin I would never lay my hand on someone else in a violent manner. It would go against everything I believe in."

"Would never." I mutter out as he darts his vision to me "Not have."

Shifting his position, he looks to me with confusion as I left my head up, my desperate attempts to hold back my tears about to fail as his lips parse in anger, my word choice not the best as he stares me down.

"What are you trying to say?"

"I heard some things." I come out and say it "Someone must have started a rumor about it when you left. One of my friends, Ava, told me about it but I didn't believe her." I shake my head with an anxious smile "Next thing I know everyone's coming up to me asking if it's true and I don't know what to say to them because I don't know if its true or not and it just breaks you down when everyone around you is saying things and your trying so hard not to believe it because you want it to not be true yet the more and more your told about it the more and more you start to doubt yourself on it and it all just gets lost in translation at some point."

"You don't actually believe it does you?" He looks to me with an angered look.

"I don't know what to believe anymore." I shake my head and bury it within my hands.

"Jesus Christ." Vince smirks "They have no evidence. Like I said I wasn't perfect but come on? Assault? Do I look like the kind of person who would do the things they are accusing me of?"

"Then what?" I shoot up with a burst of energy with laced anger "You said you're not perfect." I trail off "What do you mean by that? You're not perfect? This cryptic game is not fun."

"I had a drug problem." Vince admits "After my sister died I got into partying pretty heavy. Did some drugs I'm not proud to admit I've done but I haven't touched them in almost a year and a half." He looks to me and I look to him "I haven't touched an ounce of them in almost a year and a half. It was part of the reason we moved here."

"What kind of drugs?"

"Party ones." He sighs with defeat "Cocaine, Molly, Ecstasy." He gives me a crass look "I got mixed in with the wrong crowd and I paid the price for it. I cleaned up my act though, and I don't touch them anymore."

"Were you ever arrested?" I ask looking down to the ground.

"A party I was at got raided one night and I tried to run. The police found me in the woods with two and an eight grams of coke on me. I spent two months in jail for it but I got off on probation. I was like fourteen when that happened though it was a long time ago." I can hear the desperation in Vince's voice as he talks to me "I got busted a couple times for dunk and disorderly and underage drinking but I served my time for those and since February eighth two thousand and fifteen I haven't touched, a single substance. On my sister's grave, I haven't."

The seriousness and conviction of Vince on face value seem real to me. While I would probably believe him no matter what he says, there is something about the way in which he's told me about this and the pleading in his voice only furthers my belief that he is not lying to me. While I would much rather see the evidence outright. I know that I can not ask. Noah is now my best for the truth, and while I cannot ask him now it will go a lot towards my trusting of Vince as well as my willingness to protect and stand up for him if I find out he is lying to me.

"We've all had our struggles." I shake my head "Seems to be the harsh reality of today's society that everyone will somehow find out about it. Here nor there." He leans back on the bench, defeated in his look.

"Won't stop me though." The teen laughs "I got out of Wisconsin thinking my reputation wouldn't follow me here. I worked so hard to reinvent myself only to be faced with this shit again."

As Vince goes on I can see myself in him. I know that may seem hard to believe, but there is a large chunk of me that really worries and concerns me about what is happening to him. I experienced it myself in middle school, at the hands of bullies attacking me for mistakes I'd made not of the same caliber but with the same outcome. While I am sure Vince is fully capable and willing to strike down these attacks my heart goes out for him, and while I would have never seen it happen, there is a part of me that just fell for him so much more. The claims he makes I'll take at face value, and when he is not looking I shoot off a text to Noah asking for the information. It will be the last part of my research of him to figure out whether or not I can stand by him or be faced with a hard decision.

I put a lot of my choice in Noah, more so then I do Vince. The reason it's been so hard for me is all centered around the constant push and pull of my own conscious. I was first quick to blame others, yet have come to realize it is my own self-worth that is fighting me here. I see myself as being a strong, independent woman who can make her own decisions in life, yet when placed with a conflict of siding with a bad boy as opposed to going for someone who I know is a good person and who will be set for greatness in the later life, I am turning up and down in my decision making. Vince was the first person I really felt an attraction to. It wasn't so much his physical appearance, while I am not complaining, was more or less his kind, compassionate, open heart to accepting me and others for who they are.

That's the person I want to be with. It's the whole reason I even bother myself with the drama and torture that I endure at the hands of these bullies. I was to be with someone who stands for something that I respect, and from the looks of it I've found that something in Vince. He may not be perfect, but he sure as hell is someone I can get behind and because of that, I can really start to see the beginning come forth. My entire life up to this point has been nothing but a thin focus on the future when the now is staring me right in the face. There is a lot about Vince that I like, and I would really hope those drug charges are the only thing he's hiding.

"I've never been arrested." I tell him as he turns to me "But my past does precede me." I continue knowing he needs someone he can relate to "In the seventh grade I was friends with this girl named Lucy. She was one of my best and only friends at the time. She was a great girl, really funny and kind, just somewhat misguided." Vince nods "Easily suggestible when it came to doing things." I pause looking over the park "One day I went over her house. We were sitting in her room when he pulled out a kitchen knife, started telling me how all the cool girls in high school cut their arms to show empowerment or something. Not worded like that." I gaze before Vince "Anyways, I went along with it because I thought it was cool. I thought it would be my ticket to popularity."

"What happened?"

"Soon as someone noticed the rumors started going around. I was a cutter. I didn't know it was bad at first, believe it or not. I seriously thought I was becoming popular. Everyone was talking about me and guys were looking my way. I just didn't know it was for the wrong reasons." I sigh in withdrawal "Next thing I know I'm in the principal's office with my mom crying on the bed as they took me to a mental hospital. From that moment on I was known to everyone as the girl who got hospitalized for cutting herself. Nothing more nothing less." The man looks to me with an empathetic look on his face "People stopped talking about it of course, but they still know. New things come up and the masses move on to the more gruesome, embarrassing thing but still never forget about your thing."

"They don't bring it up anymore though?"

"No. Not really." I shrug "I just know in the back of my mind that they know. Even if they don't."

"Its the unfortunate reality of things." Vince shakes his head "Probably naive of me to think I could escape it by changing states. Nowadays that shit just follows you everywhere like a fucking black cloud."

"It helps to have someone in your corner." I try explaining to him "When I got to high school I made new friends and they all knew about it. Surprisingly enough the times changed around that sort of thing and now it's not acceptable to make fun of people who self-harm but I had people who had my back." I smile remembering the story I'm about to tell as Vince gives me one back "This one time Ava, this girl digging into me now, smacked some guy for bringing it up at the school tolerance assembly. The irony was just perfect."

"Can't begin to imagine it." The man smirks.

"My point is. Everyone needs someone who's going to be in their corner." I look to him "I may not be the toughest, strongest, most intimidating girl in the world, but I have been and will continue still to defend you."

Vince held silent for a minute, my mind racing as I worry of his next comments to me. Maybe he doesn't want my help? Maybe I pushed him away to much with my hard pressing on him and he doesn't want me to be there for him? I wait in worry as he scratches the back of his neck, the stress clearly growing as he darts his eyes between me and the ground. I can't get a read on him, yet I pray for the best as he cups his hands, his body arched down.

"I don't deserve that from you." The man shakes his head "I've lied and cheated you with this."

"It was never my place to know unless you told me."

"You have and will continue to defend me." He repeats "You just told me about the shit your facing with this now you want to throw yourself into the seventh circle of high school hell for me?" He scoffs "Usually when people find out about this kind of shit they don't rub my back and tell me it'll be okay."

"I'm not most people," I mutter in shy rebuttal.

"I just don't understand it." The man looks to me "Or... I guess I'm just not used to it per say."

"Look." I smile to him "Even if you tell me not to I still am." The man looks to me "I never ask for help, ever. I think these last couple weeks have been the only time I've ever really asked someone outright for help. I know how it is, but just as you went out of your way to do your end and then some of our projects, I'm going to go out of my way to make sure you don't have to fight this alone." I take his hand in mine "We all make mistakes, it doesn't mean we are bad people because of them. I promise you that much if anything."

We share a long exchange of eye contact before smiles creep before our faces. I didn't expect to see that come out of me, never in a million years would I have expected to be that powerful and assertive in front of someone, let alone a guy I liked on something that has caused me so much pain and worries over the last couple weeks.

In holding hands I can feel the romance blossoming between us, the warmth in which we have radiating through the each-others body through contact is unlike anything I could think of at the moment. As if the lights of heaven shined down upon me with the purpose of my life, to make sure this guy sitting here in front of me does not feel alone. I was blessed to have had the support of Ava and my other friends when I first got to high school, a support I hardly deserved for the things I'd done. Now I feel it is my turn to give that back to someone, that person being Vince Campbell, the man I want to share as many days I can with. No matter what the story reads.

"I really appreciate this Alex." The man gives me a hug "It means the world in fact."

"No need to thank me." I hold him close to me "Everyone needs a little love in their life."

"Think everyone needs a little Alex in their life." He shoots back at me with a grin.

"I'm not that full of myself yet."

"Oh, I'm sure you'll get there." He shoots back to me with a cheerful look as my phone vibrates.

"Damn." I shake my head looking down at the screen "I got to get home."

"Oh." the teen scurries up with me "I didn't know I was holding you."

"My mom wants my help cooking this new entree she found online. I told her I would come home right after school and help her with it. Which is unfortunately right about now."

"Oh, nice." He slips his hands into his pockets "What's the dish?"

"It's some kind of Chicken dish." I shrug. "Not really sure yet but I'm bound to find out." I start backing away from him but stop mid-stride, retracing my steps back to him with a goofy look "You want to come later?"

"Uh... Yeah." He gives a half smile to my immediate frown.

"You don't have to if you don't want to. I understand if you're busy."

"I just get nervous." He shrugs "I'm more used to the steak and rice microwave for five minutes and watch white trash TV type deal then actually sitting down and eating a meal." He hangs his head down "I guess I worry my table manners aren't what they used to me."

"My family's chill." I try to play it off cool doing my best to convince him "I'm sure you'll fit right it."

"Alright." He shrugs with more confidence now "Guess I'll give it a shot."

"I'll text you." I start backing away as the man stands and watches me "Wear something you love."

I don't know why I shouted that, but a huge smile comes across my face as I turn to begin my walk home. There is a new feeling in the air and I'd love nothing more than to soak it all up. My heart racing, my lungs full of air, a lightness sensation in my feet at every stop I take may as well be on a cloud. It's something I'd have to guess is love.


	9. Chapter 9

Forbidden Lust: Family Dinner  
A Novella: By Benjamin Hale  
Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

My heart is fluttering, I can barely contain my excitement. It seems as if everything were to be going my way, and I never want it to stop. Rushing home with the news of Vince and my newfound attraction to him I immediately run downstairs to tell Haley about what happened. Even though her knowledge about the last couple of weeks is limited, I want to share my experience with her and get her opinion on what I should do next.

There is so much going through my head I can hardly sort it out. I stop on the stairs to catch my breath and collect my thoughts. I want to ask Vince out. I want to be his girl. Right now I could care less what anyone else has to say about the two of us, him basically. The way I feel for him peers its head through the horrors of school and makes every last bit of torture seem worth it now that Vince is back. A feeling of calm rushes over me, as I come to realize everything will be okay. There's really nothing that could happen right now that could change my mind about things, and I hope and pray this dinner with him goes well. While we are not dating yet, and my invite to him was strict as friends I would hope to maybe be able to ask him out once it's over. God willing he accepts my request.

There lay so much at my feet it is hard for me to come to terms with it all. I have to calm down and think about things before I do them. A sudden burst of fear piles through me as I walk down the stairs and knock on Haley's door. What if I made the wrong choice by inviting Vince over here? What if it doesn't go the way I would hope it does and ends in disaster? Maybe it was too soon. If I scare him off it will be hard to recover from, then all my hard work will have been for nothing. The continued harassment at school, the cold calls and bullies will have won. I'd is nothing more than a shell of my former self-having pout everything on the line to yield nothing in return. Then what? I go back to my miserable life of academics and college to one day make a lot of money I can never share with anyone? This whole thing's got to my head, I need a reprieve. Something. ANYTHING.

Once Haley opens her bedroom door I am hit with a blast of cold air. I don't know why her room is so cold but I walk in none the less, making my way to her sofa as she sits on her bed and closes her laptop.

"Sorry." She tells me with a sigh "Works been really busy recently."

"It's all right." I put her worries at ease "What have you been working on."

"Designs." The girl shrugs "I have to meet a certain number of designs a month in order to keep my job there so I've been crunching overtime to make sure I hit my mark." The girl lays down "What's up with you."

"More boy drama." I laugh crossing my legs "Typical garbage."

"This guy you like?" She sits up "Vince?"

I nod in approval, leaning forward with a hard swallow. Somewhat nervous now as to what I am going to say about him and even telling Haley I invited him over for a dinner. I'm one hundred percent nervous about what she is going to tell me about it, my mind racing as I try to figure out the best way to put it.

"I met with him today. We talked at a park outside of school. And, there's been a lot of rumors going around about him that like, have really destroyed his reputation." Haley listened close to what I have to say "I defended him, but I was at the end of my line. So I talked to this guy, Noah, the one I met at the arcade some time ago. And he sort of helped me a lot with it." I trail off not knowing where to take the conversation "Anyways. I was growing angry with all of it and I was ready to just give up when Vince came back today and we talked and he sorted things out. I got like super hyped up over it with his honesty and the respect he has for me that I invited him over for dinner tonight without thinking about it and I don't know if its a good decision or not." I catch my breath but am cut off by Haley.

"Why are you so worried about it?" she looks to me with a smile "It's nothing serious it seems. A friendly gesture in a time of hardship. I would do the same but no guy I'd be with would ever accept it."

"I just don't want it to go bad." I sit back on the couch "The meaning of it. The implications."

"You've built those up in your head Alex." Haley laughs "If he believes it is a totally innocent thing then you have nothing to worry about. Of course, you like him and I'm sure he knows that. Why else would you invite him over to our house for dinner?" The girl asks as I think of what she tells me "We work ourselves up so much over all this that we lose sight of what's important to us." Haley scoots to the edge of the bed.

"I really like him." I look up to her. "More then I've liked any other guy before."

"Then do something about it." Haley encourages me "The only thing you have to lose from it is what could have been if you do not ask him out. So what if he has rumors about him or some kids are talking shit. You are in high school. Its what everyone does about everyone." We both share a laugh "High school was built off the rumors of its students and that will never change. It's part of the culture."

"These rumors though, they're really bad."

"You get some of those on occasion." Haley stands up and grabs a soda from the fridge and tosses it to me "At least once a year when I was still in high school." Haley shakes her head in shame "It happens more then you think, and a lot of people end up suffering as a result of it." Our conversation turning serious we both carry on.

"It's just so much sometimes." I sip my freshly cracked soda can "I don't know what to do with it."

"You can't let it get to you. You let it get to you they win." Haley leans forward "The way you survive through high school is to mind your own business and not feed into the petty drama that surrounds you. Because as soon as you leave that school for the last time, no one is going to care whom you want to date or whom you sat with at lunch." I lean back in my seat "It all becomes a thing of the past. No one cares anymore."

"I could think about the future all I want. Occupying myself with the dreams of a libertarian style school where everyone minds their business and doesn't care what anyone else does but that's a far cry from the millions of thoughts that go through my mind every single day about whether or not I'm making a good choice here."

For a minute Haley pauses. I look at her intently as she combs her mind in trying to figure out what to say to me next. I can tell she wants to tell me something serious, but she can't bring herself to do it. After a minutes time, she shakes her head and smiles at me chuckling to herself a little bit.

"You act like this thing is a courted marriage." My sister leans back with a smile "You're not confined to him for the rest of your days on earth. If things don't work out you can always give him the boot and move onto the next one." A smile creeps across both our faces "Then again I'm sure this will only make you fall for him more."

"Is it wrong to think there is a part of me that doesn't want to fall for me?" I ask leaning forward "A part of me that wishes I had never met him. Never had to deal with all this drama and bullshit every day?"

"It's scary putting your heart out there." Haley looks to me with a serious dart "It's one of the hardest things a person our age can do socially. To come out and express your attraction, care. Show any kind of emotion what so ever outside of anger or joy is not easy for even some of the most popular kids in school."

"It's not that I'm scared of feeling something I'm scared what I'm not going to feel anymore. For so long its just been me myself and I. It scares me that I may not have the luxury of that anymore. Especially if I decide to ask Vince out. I lose a sense of myself to the tide of sharing my life with someone. I don't know how I feel about that."

Haley sits up and rubs her chin as I say this. I don't know if I even make sense with the jumble of words coming out of my mouth. But I know for sure I need to tell someone what's going on, and Haley is the only person in the house or even amongst anyone I know right now whom I feel close enough with to express these kinds of feelings with. It worries me to no end the potential nature of my relationship with Vince. Even though it hasn't yet happened I can see it building up inside me like a balloon that will not pop. As if it were to be inevitable I would ask him out or vice versa.

"You don't have to lose who you are just because you date someone." Haley leans back on her bed "There is give and take in every relationship, and it's important to figure that out with them in the beginning so there aren't any expectations on either end of the spectrum." My sister puts her hair back in a bun "This is all stuff you'll need to figure out. I can't really tell you what to do because every relationship is different in its own unique way."

"I just hope it all works out." I stand up stretching myself out before grabbing my soda "As tormented and beat as I am with all this I really like him." Haley and I exchange a look of serious passion "He makes me feel a certain way no one else has made me feel before. I don't think that's something I should just let go of."

"The best advice I ever got took it one step at a time." Haley smiles to me "You don't have to rush into things if you're not sure about them." Haley smiles as I walk to exit her room "I'll look forward to meeting this guy later on tonight. I want to see the man who's got my sister all worked up twenty-four seven."

The two of us exchange a playful laugh before going about our separate business. Haley staying in her room to do whatever it is she was doing before and me upstairs to talk with my mother, whom I know is home by the smell of baked chicken seeping its way through the basement door crack. Haley never ceases to make me feel better about things, and I always leave my conversations with her feeling much better then I had before. It seems now, however, that I am in search of the same with my mother, who for the last couple of months or so would have liked nothing more than to try and interject herself within my life to learn of my happenings like a CI to crime.

Our relationship hasn't been the best recently on the part of both our consistently busy schedules as well as differing viewpoints in terms of how to live life and what to do with it. I have always been independent, never really needing the assistance of my mother to sort out problems I may be having or give me condolence when times are hard or things don't go my way. It's been like that ever since I was young, and it's what I believe has caused a fracture in the growth our relationship throughout my later years living under her roof. Of course, I play as much a part in it as she does, but that seldom gives any kind of silence to the growing separation between us.

Walking upstairs into the kitchen, I find my mother cooking dinner by her lonesome. Like always she is listening to some old music I don't really know but have come to weirdly enjoy as if I were to actually be a nostalgic housewife reliving the days of my youth through old songs and tapes. Finding a seat at the countertop table it takes a second for my mom to realize I am there but welcomes me with a warm smile once she does. Despite our major differences and the bundle of nerves built up inside me around asking her for Vince's seat at the table, her warm motherly embrace brings me a sense of calm and comfort. Though she only smiles to me I find myself easing the tension built within me, a feeling of bliss as it deviates from my body in every possible way.

"Hey, honey." She continues to cut cucumbers for the salad "How was school today."

"It was good." I lean forward with anxiety "We got grades back for our history test. Did better then I expected."

"That's great." She doesn't break a stride in her cut "If there's anyone who can do it, it's you."

"I do my best." I smirk to myself shaking my head "I meant to ask you something last night but I never got the chance to do it." We make eye contact "I wanted to have a friend of mine over for dinner tonight. Someone from my history class I worked on the project with." I trail off as my mom stops and looks at me "It's nothing special. I just wanted to have him over for dinner with us. Introduce him to the family."

In saying those words there comes a weird smile over my mother's face. I can tell she is thinking something but I don't know what it is. It begins to consume me as she yields her speech and continues to finish cutting the cucumber as if to have never heard me say anything. Replaying those words throughout my head I come to realize what she may be thinking, my face turning bright red as she walks over to me and sides a bowl of dough over to me.

"This boy wouldn't happen to be your boyfriend would he?" My heart starts racing as I feel my face flush red with embarrassment. A half-cracked smile washing across my face.

"No mom. He's not my boyfriend."

"Sure sounds like he is." Mom slides me a tray alone with spray oil to lay out cookies on a baking sheet, to which I do not argue within the slightest as I know she is only doing to so she can spend more time with me.

"We're just friends right now. Nothing serious."

"I'd be far-fetched to believe that one." My mom tosses her hair back as she starts to chop carrots "The way I've heard you talk about him before. The same one who came over the house a while back? Always coming home with a smile on your face like you got something good going for you." My mom smirks "I was your age once too Alex I know a little thing or two about high school romance."

"We aren't dating yet." I roll a ball of cookie dough and place it on the tray "Had our fair share of problems in the last couple weeks but things seemed to have turned around."

"That kind of things happen all the time." My mom shakes her head "You can never have the perfect relationship honey it will never be that way. Start preparing yourself now because no matter how hard you try there will always be something. Always." I smirk shaking my head.

"You and dad seem pretty content."

"We've been married for over twenty years. Even now we still don't get along sometimes. The establishment of understanding and communication is the most important thing you can have in a relationship and since your father and I have had twenty years to get it down, we're able to better work out our problems."

"There's just a lot of drama around everything." I place another ball on the tray "I'm not used to that."

"High school is full of it. So is adulthood. I'm sure Haley's told you that by now." I nod "The true test of a good high school relationship is how you manage to get through the drama. I dated this guy in high school, it was the talk of the school. Everyone was talking about it, trying to get the scoop, break us up. It's all part of the game. If you can stick with each other through the worse times, it makes the good times more worthwhile."

In spite of having heard most of this from Haley just now, my mothers attempt to help me are more so appreciated then they are helpful. I can't really nor do I really want to delve into the relationship I have with Vince with her just yet. I would rather her say yes and talk with me about communication and her relationship with dad then tell my mother I may soon be going out with a convict before she knows it.

There is, however, a weird sense of calm and comfort that comes with my mother talking to me about this. It's different coming from Haley whom I can trust telling her things I would not tell my mom. But as I sit here I find myself in a weirdly calm sense of relief that my mother is actually in somewhat approval of this. Had she not approved I would have heard it by now, my biggest worry in all of this. Continuing to roll out cookie dough onto the sheet, I let off a heavy sigh as my mother comes over to me and helps me out, her deep blue eyes staring me down as I shake my head.

"What's wrong?" She asks me with a curious thought

"I'm just thinking." I respond quickly "Seems like all of this just moves so fat you never have time to think."

"Relationships aren't easy." My mom leans down on the counter "You have to put in a lot of work and expect that nothing is going to happen as a result of it." We share a look "Haley told me about him some time ago. Nothing too personal just the ins and outs." I lean back with shock "I don't see you much anymore. I like to know you're doing okay."

"Two weeks ago there were some rumors about him in school. Ava and Stacy weren't so nice to me about it all and got like the whole school to attack me for not believing them." I swallow hard "He's a good guy. But he's nowhere near perfect. I just worry a lot what it all means to me? Sometimes I don't even know what I'm doing."

I didn't think I would catch myself on the verge of tears over this yet the warm fade of just one sliding down my cheek is enough to weaken me into a childish state. The stresses of it all having finally got to me, bringing me down to my knees in a vicious tackle. There be no reprieve for my weeping heart tonight, as I cannot cancel the dinner. I have no idea what I am going to do now as my mom takes my hand and holds it between her's, the warmth radiating up my body like bolts of lightning to a metal pole, shocking me up with newfound spirit.

"Take it slow." My mother says with a smile "I've told your sister a million times. There's no need to rush. If it were meant to be then they will come when the time is right. Don't try and force yourself into something that you don't feel is the right thing to do. Even if your brain is telling you to do it." I wipe my tears "I've always been fond of your ability to see the good and bad in things and make the right decisions. You don't deserve what happened to you, nobody does. But running to him is not going to fix anything in the long run."

I nod to this. As always my mother always helps me to see the things I neglect to forget. With the help of both Haley and my mother, I head upstairs and prepare for the dinner. I have no idea what to expect but as the time ticks closer and closer to when he will get here I grow more and more nervous. I keep telling myself it's nothing special, but even I can not believe the lies I tell myself about it anymore. I know what this is, and I know exactly why I am doing it. It is the real make or breaks for me tonight, a chance for me to see who Vince really is as a person. To see if after all the torment and strife I've had to go through on the back of the bullying and torment, that I could really see myself with Vince as my boyfriend or if I'll need to have a very hard conversation with him.

Arriving shortly after seven at night we waste no time and get right to eating. By now my father has got home as well as Luke and Haley from whatever they were doing to share a family dinner with Vince. The whole ordeal lasts almost an hour and a half, my breath held the entire time as the first course, the second and then dessert finally come and go, leaving us to migrate onto the couches for a little basketball before its time to wrap it up. The total two-hour meeting is finished on a high note, with Vince talking to my dad about basketball and other inconspicuous things I would have never thought he would be into. A learning experience for both of us as I walk with him outside to his car and rest upon its hood. The cold night air nipping at my face as Vince stands before me in casual dress attire.

"I think that went well." Vince digs his hands into his slack pockets with a smile "You have a lovely family."

"Thank you." I blush crossing my arms "I'm glad you could make it."

"I'm glad I came." The teen smirks "Could talk for hours about the lakers. Surprised I managed to cut it short."

"My dad would yap your ear off if you let him."

"I wouldn't mind that at all." I raise my eyebrows in shock.

"Oh really?" We both share a laugh "Why would you ever put yourself through that?"

"I don't know." The man shrugs "If it meant I got to see you just one more day I'd come back until I die."

A silence falls between us as my heart begins to race. Vince is so hot as he looks deep into my eyes. I can almost see into his soul with the look of passion and devotion he holds in his stare of me, his body slowly moving closer to me with the smallest steps. I have no idea what to do, but I know what's coming. Standing up tall, I push myself onto my tiptoes as he closes in, my eyes fluttering shut as his soft lips come into contact with mine. Fireworks burst inside me as we hold our kiss, the warm embrace of his arms wrapping around mine to the soft pluck of his lips upon mine sends chills down my spine. For the first time ever, I feel like I'm in love.

Breaking the kiss, the man steps back with a bashful smile. I open my eyes to find him standing close to me, no more than a foot away as he takes my hand before his and places a kiss on its back "I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about you, Alex." He smiles wide "I don't want this to end."

"It doesn't have too." I kiss his cheek with a nervous grin "I'll still be here. Tomorrow and the next."

There comes over me a peaceful calm as I feel his hands wrap around my waist. I wait patiently for what I hope will come out of him next. My body inching closer to his with every breath I take. No hold bar between us as the line between our friendship and relationship fades before me. Though he lay much taller then me I lean my head into his lips, a warm kissed placed before them as I pull back, our eyes making contact as a grin comes over his face.

"What do you think about going steady?" He asks as a wide smile so large it hurts comes over me.

"I'd have no objections."

A kiss seals our newfound romance as we part ways. A final wave between us as I watch the man get into his car and drives down the street. My thoughts lingering as his tail lights fade out of sight.


	10. Chapter 10

Forbidden Lust: Steady Under The Sunday

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

My once fearful thoughts about dating Vince and the torrent of horrors and disgrace I went through in talking with my mother and sister about such an effort lay no comparison anymore to the reality of what my relationship has been with Vince after three weeks of dating. In the last three weeks thing have been beyond great between the two of us, almost to the point of me wondering if we are even dating each other they seem so drama free.

As I had initially expected, the drama at school hit us hard when it came out that we were dating. Ava and Stacy went after me hard and for good reason. She wanted to be with Vince. I had some suspicions about it in the past but once Vince told me the story it all began to make sense. The lies and rumors surrounding us were all part of her game, that once I exposed I put an end too. Of course, there are still residual effects here and there but I would never come to believe that they were true. With Vince's confirmation as well as Noah's things were all good.

Through even the deepest confines of my mind, I would not have believed that things with Vince would be so easy and carefree. My worries about a change in myself, as well as a change in what I do and a loss of interest in school, was nearly a compounded fear I had constructed within my mind. With Vince needing to do well in school we often spent the majority of our time together working on homework or doing school work, only to be broken every so often by an intense makeout session or a movie of some kind. It was everything I could have asked for in a relationship with someone, and I have been more than glad to share my hand with Vince thus far.

While things have been more and more relaxed these last two weeks in the past two days I have begun to feel the pressure a little bit. Through our time dating, I have yet to give myself completely to my boyfriend, causing a weird kind of feeling between the two of us everytime things do get sexual between us. It's not so much a bad thing, for Vince and I had talked at length about my desire to wait and remain a virgin until I am ready, it's more so the pressure from outside avenues like Haley or the made up voices in my head telling me the time is now. By this point, I would not mind losing my virginity to Vince, but the fear has been what's holding me back.

"Two days ago in the wake of a more heated and passionate makeout session between us, Vince tried to make a move on me, which I shot down just as soon as it began. I could tell he was upset and ensured to question me about it trying to figure out the root of why I would not do it. The mentality of promiscuous sex being an expectation amongst a relationship crossing my mind various times as he tried to dig it out of me.

"I'm not sure." I told him leaning back on the bed with frustration "I'm just not ready."

"You just seem pretty comfortable with me day to day. If it's something with me then I'd like to know."

"No!" I shot up with worry "It's nothing to do with you."

"Then what does it have to do with?"

These continued questions growing on my nerves, I sigh and shake my head. In all honesty, I don't really know why I don't want to do it. All the signs are in my body. Every time I leave him I'm so wet I have to get myself off before I can do anything. Come to all reality I have no real idea as to why I refuse to let it happen. I tried explaining this to him but it didn't seem to be enough. Even I was beginning to lose sight of my reasons why. Their weight losing meaning with every passing day as a thing with Vince grew heavier and heavier.

I tried to take it to Haley, but she was no help to me at all. Her answer, though it was true, was to just wait until I was ready, which is what I have been doing ever since I met the guy. I don't know when I'll be ready and it's starting to consume me in my hours not spent on homework or doing fun things with him. All I know is I need to figure it out, and figure it out sooner than later, as with the coming of the new year I held onto hope that something would change around me that would allow the open-mindedness of my now very prudish mind.

I wake up Saturday morning much later then I would have hoped. I had a busy Friday night with school projects as well as an eleven o'clock movie with Vince that I adored very much. My clock reads ten am, and I jump out of bed and rush downstairs to catch the last of Saturday morning breakfast without bothering to check my phone. Sometimes its nice for me to just unplug for a couple minutes every morning and enjoy some quality family time with my mother, father, and brother. Luke is always up to something and it never ceases to make me laugh despite my greater judgment. Today seems to be no different, as I come downstairs and he is going on about some kind of model rocket he wants to build with my dad. The only problem is the rocket is lost at school, prompting a hilarious debate on how they want to break into the school and steal it back. Their talk helping me to take the stress away even just for that second.

Finishing my waffles and orange juice I head back upstairs to a long text from Vince. I read it as quickly as I can, finding out that he wants to meet with me today to meet one of his friends. I smile at this and start getting ready. In the total of the three weeks we've been dating I have yet to meet one of his friends. It worried me at first that he was embarrassed about me or that he was trying to hide something. But I soon came to realize that he didn't have many friends outside of me and two other people, one of whom isn't even in the state. His other friend, Tom, who he constantly talks to me about seemed to be some sort of mystical creature of sorts always off and away or busy with something every time we were supposed to meet up. It was a running joke that he was Vince's invisible friend who didn't really exists but that he made up. We had many laughs over that.

Our meeting is supposed to be at one, so I make sure to take my time and shower in addition to dressing myself for the weather and any other element that may come my way. I'm not so much nervous about meeting Tom more so then I am hanging around Vince with someone close to him. I can deal with people in school and I can certainly deal with people whom I do not know. Yet there comes to be this weird sensation I get when hanging around people I know as if I can not be myself around them and have to put on this persona of sorts.

I know in the back of my head that this is an important meeting. Its one of the more important milestones of the relationship between Vince and I, as the first three weeks, was more about us as opposed to the integration of our relationship into other peoples lives. Making a big deal about it probably isn't the way for me to go, but I will continue to do it under the knowledge that this meeting could make or break the next step between Vince and I. Amongst all the people I know who are dating, the migration between the relationship they share with their boyfriends or girlfriends into one another friend group is an important time. Of course, since I am lacking real friends at the hands of Ava and the rumors, I really didn't have much of a group to present.

His meeting of my family was by far and away the most important thing he could do for me, and we got that out of the way before we were even established as a couple. Now it's time to play the reversal. I haven't talked much about Vince and his family to him for good reason. There seemed to be far too much there that I didn't want to once again rip open memories of it for him. I hadn't met his mother or father yet, but I have been over his house, with just brought this weird sense of uncomfortability to me if anything. Tom, from the words of Vince, is like a brother to him, and from the way I see it, is like meeting someone just as important as his family would be.

By the time one o'clock comes around Vince is knocking on the front door. My dad calls me down and I rush down the stairs, yet not before the two of them start talking about the Lakers season as well as hockey, which I had just recently figured out Vince is very good at when he challenged some street kids to twenty dollars if they could beat him in a shooting match on one of their target practice nets. I let the two catch up before we head off in his car. The growth of his life after the two of us have started dating and the growing admission of his hidden life has been amazing.

"You look good today." I smile as we head down my street to the soft sounds of classic rock.

"You're looking quite beautiful yourself." Vince smiles back to me, a keen look in his eye as we stop.

"How was your night?"

"The usual. Watched sports, did some homework. Went to bed." He shrugs "Not much different than any other night I suppose." A laugh is shared between the two of us. "I did manage to get you something, however."

Reaching into the center divide of his car the teen pulled out of me a rolled up shirt and handed it off to me with a wide smile on his face "I went to a coffee shop this morning and they were giving these away. I thought you might like it given your interest in astronomy and the planets."

Unrolling the shirt I stretch it out to find a nerdy pun like the picture of all the planets doing weird poses in the line of their desired space from the sun. It was nerdy as all hell, but I couldn't have been happier to receive it. I smile wide with a shocked laugh filling the room "Thank you so much." I give him a kiss on the cheek "I love it."

"I'm glad you like it." He says hopping onto the highway "I know it's stupid but it makes me smile."

"I love it, Vince, really." I run his shoulder "Thank you so much."

"I figure one day you're going to have some amazing breakthrough in science where they'll hold some super serious press conference and you'll wear that shirt to it." The man cracks himself up "I don't know maybe."

"I would so do that." I smile back to him "That's such a good idea."

"Figure I could use it as a means of apology as well." I look to him with a confused look as to why he is apologizing to me, my heart racing in anticipation "I've been trying to force some things on you recently that I shouldn't have. I don't want you to get the impression that I don't respect you or your wishes. And I feel like I haven't been doing that recently. Especially the last two days." He swallows hard "You live a certain life for long enough you start to think it's the only life you'll ever live. Granted my life in Wisconson wasn't the best I still have some residual effects that come back to bite me in the worst ways. The way I handle relationships is one of them."

"You don't have to apologize Vince." I look to him with a way of concern "I know I can be hard to handle sometimes and that's on me. There's a learning curve with every relationship. We're still trying to figure ours out the way I see it." He looks to me with a half-baked smile then back on the road.

"I don't know Alex. I love spending time with you. It's been the best experience of my life and then some. It makes me feel a certain way I can't quite explain. But god I worry I'm going to fuck this up."

"Because of your past?" I ask as the car goes silent.

"Cumulation of things." He shakes his head with worry "I just worry I'm going to mess this all up somehow. You know? Like somethings going to come up or I'm going to say something that doesn't mix well."

"You talk about it like it's a predetermined thing almost." I squint my eyebrows trying not to get angry "Let's just take things one day at a time, work out the kinks as they come along and not worry about tomorrow." I respond as best I can do what he says, to which I only get a shrug off from him as we exit the freeway.

Silence fills the car as we both lean back in our seats. Not to say I don't share some of the same concerns as Vince does I would never bother to tell them to him. Especially in a setting like that. Those are the kinds of things you tell your friends once I leave, not right to my face about how your concerned something is going to come out of the woodwork. Only makes me wonder a lot more what he still may be hiding from me.

While I can't be mad at his honesty to me, one of his most redeeming qualities in my eyes, my mind begins to race as we get to the park. Having not said a word in over two minutes the tension is ripe between us, and I do not want to be the person who falls on my words and consoles him about things being okay until he takes another shot at trying to adjust what he said. I can only hope that things between us will stay good, but it is inevitable that fights will come up sooner than later, its almost an expected thing in terms of relationship standards.

I wait until we park before I even bother to look at Vince. Now I am pissed about this. I don't really know why, but I am. To me, I guess it feels like he is going behind my back. To say that he would expect something to come up that would put our relationship in jeopardy. To even say that it would just be a matter of time before things were to come up really rubbed me the wrong way. Turning off the car Vince leans back in his seat and sighs. I keep my eye on him through the corner of my eye as he collects his wallet and phone but stopping before he exits.

"I didn't mean that in a bad way." The man looks to me with a sympathetic look "I don't make excuses for myself and I sure as hell own up to the shit I've done." He continues on as I cross my arms "Things haven't been easy for me. You and I." He points between us "Is the first relationship I've had in a long time that I don't want to go south. And I guess that's why I'm so nervous that the smallest thing, no matter what it could be, might put an end to this."

I pause for a second, tracing my vision to catch his glace just seconds before he darts his "I've stuck with you through the drama at school, your absence to Wisconson and the rumors that have torn the both of our lives apart. We weren't even dating then. I had no obligations to stay with you Vince, but I bit the bullet for the way I feel about you, and that's a fact." I turn his head with my hand to catch my gaze "If there is one thing that I know, its that I'm going to stick by your side. No matter what happens." I affirm to him as I look down to the crumb-filled cup holder.

"You really mean that don't you?"

"I wouldn't be telling you right now if I didn't believe it."

The young boys light breath fill my ears as he looks to me with a compassionate grin. There is nothing more in this world I love more then to hear his breathe for some reason as if every breath he takes with me were to be the metronome of my love for everything he does. It's easy for me to forgive when there's not much to forget about what he said to me. I know what he means now, and there's no reason for me to continue and hold a grudge. Like me, I think he holds himself to a really high standard when it comes to me. I can relate to him on that, and I know why he is so tormented by the nagging thought that every little thing will be analyzed or examined in a negative manner.

"Like I said. Let's take things one step at a time."

"I can do that." The boy smiles parting my hair behind my ear "I just don't want to lose you."

"Your not." I kiss his lips "Not so long as I'm still breathing."

With that, we exit the car and head into the park on route to meet with Tom. As we hold hands in route to a nice overlay in the middle of the park my heart begins to beat. We are closing in on a very important time in our relationship from my eyes, and I do not want to mess it up. I know the meeting will be short, as Vince told me before he arrived that Tom would just be stopping by most likely on his way to work. Yet I still clamor at the bit thinking of all the things that could go wrong. Kind of hypocritical of me to have judged him earlier for voicing it. Though I am more of a stuff it down inside and hope everything goes well kind of person.

As we approach a gazebo full of benches and a couple steaked in grills for people to use I wrap myself in my heavy sweatshirt as we wait. The temperature is only in the sixties but it may as well be in the thirties by now. The way my skinny jeans press against my legs with that cold untouched feeling of warmth makes me shiver as I take a seat. I look around to the ten, maybe fifteen other people around me. Most of them are families young in age. A child throws a ball with his father and other kids run and scream around as their parents watch from afar. It makes me smile seeing them, and I am brought to thought about one day possibly having children of my own. I know I am nowhere near ready to make that commitment yet, but It still crosses my mind, taking me out of myself for a couple seconds.

"He should be here soon." Vince sits across from me on the opposite end of the picnic table "Five minutes."

"I'm excited to meet him." I say with a smile "Meeting your best friend is a tall order for me."

"He's a pretty laid back guy." Vince shrugs "We go back though. Wisconson and all. He was the first person I called when I found out I was moving here. I don't know if I would have made it here without him."

"He's that good a friend?" I ask with the question "Seems more like a brother to me."

"May as well be." Vince leans forward taking my hand "He was the only person in Wisconson that kept me on my shit. When he left, that's when everything went south for me. Even from LA, he would rip my ass for the things I did. I moved here and things were different. No more games. Told me straight up he was going to show me the right way to do things. No more partying, no more bad shit. Keep me on the straight and narrow."

"Looks like he's done a pretty good job of it thus far."

"We've had our moments." Vince sighs "Sometimes we don't see eye to eye on things. I want to blow off steam and he's telling me to do my homework like he's my dad or something." I listen close "It's not like I hate it, but sometimes you just need to be young for once. Of course, I eat that when I pull perfect grades in every class and we sit and celebrate playing Madden all Friday night." We both share a laugh "It is what it is I suppose."

"You ever think about going back?" I ask as he makes eye contact with someone in the distance then back onto me real quick "Like to the way things were?"

"I have my days." He smirks "I know what that will lead me to and god forbid I did I give you full permission to kick me as hard as you can in the nuts." I laugh at his request along with him "I only came close once. When I first got here." The man stands up "thanks to this guy though I ain't doing that anymore."

I stand up and turn to find the two men already in an embrace of one another. I stand back and let them greet each other as if they hadn't seen one another in days or even weeks. Even though I know they were probably hanging out with one another last night. Tom looks like such an easy going guy, a tallish man with shortish brown hair and brown eyes that could melt a girls heart upon first look. They remind me a lot of Vince's in a lot of ways. He doesn't have much stature or builds as Vince does, but he is not fat by any means. They even wear the same style clothing. Jeans and a t-shirt. It makes me smile thinking to myself how similar they look.

"Alex, this is Tom." I make the first contact with the man as he sticks his hand out immediately to shake my hand with a warm and welcoming smile "Tom this is Alex."

"It's nice to meet you." He nods his head to me as I do the same.

"It's nice to meet you as well." I step towards Vince as my man offers each of us to take a seat, the conversation kicking right off as Tom removes his backpack and leans forward to both Vince and me sitting on the opposite side of the bench from him, my hand grabbing his as the two men start to talk.

"How was the trip over here?"

"Boring." The teen places his phone down on the bench "Couldn't have picked a worse spot to meet."

"Come on man I was on borrowed time this morning. Didn't want to make you go out of your way?"

"Why not pick somewhere near the school then? I'd take my chances cutting through the woods than have to put my life in the hands of the shitty drivers they have here in California."

"It's always something aye?"

"You know me." The man shares a laugh "Always have to break your balls."

"That's his forte." Vince nods to me with a lean over "It's the only way he knows how to crack a joke."

"Don't let him fool you with his perception of me. I am a very funny person."

"Only on weekends after three." Both men break down into laughter, which I awkwardly and uncomfortably join in on as not to seem like I do not know what they are talking about even though I have no idea.

"Anyways." Tom begins as he catches his breath "It's nice to meet you Alex. I've heard a lot about you."

"Oh really?" I look over to Vince "Wouldnt have expected this one to go on about me."

"Its the only thing he talks about." I smile with a blush "Comes up to me and tells me how he met this incredible girl in his class. How he was so nervous. It's like we were in middle school again."

"I think it's adorable the way he gets nervous." I smile nudging the man.

"You haven't seen anything yet." The teen leans back fixing his hair "Won a raffle to throw the first pitch at a Brewers game once. Talk about nerves, this guy choked on the mound, threw the ball almost six feet off from the catcher and his one of the sound technicians in the shin." I can see Vince turn bright red.

"That was one of my worst chokes." The man puts his hands up.

"His performance is always on par though. Once he gets those nerves out of the way. He kills the game."

I laugh along as we go on and tell various stories about one another, including some of the ones that Vince and I have shared over the last three weeks. All in all the meeting goes well, and I am more than happy with the results of it in the long run outside of the feeling that things between the three of us were more one-sided than anything, as the two men keep their inside jokes running while I am left in the dust. But then again what do I really expect from the teenage boys. I am just happy that I could meet Tom and be able to see another side of Vince.

I learned a lot about his time in middle school and the failed science project he had in the eighth grade, as well as other funny stories, some funny to the bone some sad with a touch of funny at the end. Yet the laughs around the table and the genuine good time between the three of us is what puts me at great ease if anything. There are far too many ways it could have gone not in my favor, and by the end of our meeting I am more than happy about the results in meeting Tom,l giving me a whole new insight into Vince and who he was and is now.

After leaving the park and warming up in the car Vince takes me to a pizza place where we get some food and then head to a nice spot where we can just sit and eat. Enjoying the pizza we got I start to think about something that Tom said that really got to me. Not so much in a bad way, but in a questioning kind of way. He explained to me, in brief, a dream that Vince had of joining the army when he was younger, and how although he could not want to go that route anymore due to his past, that out of high school he would want to go on a mission trip somewhere.

At the time it was completely inconspicuous, and I didn't think much of it other than his actions being nice and noble in the slightest. However, as I began to stew with it I began to wonder about our future. I remember myself saying to take things one day at a time but that was before I realized that Vince maybe didn't want to stay here in California right out of college. I had just assumed that he would give most of my friends would get into UCLA and or stick around here, for the most part, to go to school or find work somewhere. Not many people would leave and if they did it would still be within the confines of a reachable area. Yet when other countries or even east coast is brought up I began to worry that this place was only a rest stop for Vince and that he would slowly fade himself away.

I didn't bring it up then as I did not want to cause more of a deal then there already was, yet in the hopes of trying to figure out what was going on, I waited until now. Choosing to voice my expressions carefully after a long thought process on what it was I would say to him and how I would bring it up.

"That's good pizza," I say finishing my last piece of the crust as Vince sit back in the seat.

"One of the best places I know out here." He smiles at me as silence fills the room.

"Again. Thank you for letting me meet with Tom today."

"It's no worries at all." He smiles turning his head to me "Probably see a lot more of him now if you want."

"He said something back there that caught my attention." The man sits up as I continue on with my sentence "I didn't know that you wanted to join a mission somewhere. Even join the army?" I ask as the teen sits up.

"The army was a rash decision I came to." He mellows out his voice as I look out to the crashing waves over the beautiful mountainous California coast "I thought that joining the army would help straighten me out when I was like fifteen or sixteen. Carried it with me when I moved here but after I got into school and I started looking into other things the thought sort of faded away. My desire to serve though didn't. Just to kill."

"Hence the missions."

"I don't really know if I want to do it. It comes and goes with me." He looks over to me "I just feel like over the course of my short life I've been given a lot of second chances to change who I am and make the best of who I know I can become. Seems unfair of me not to give some of that best to someone else. Put it to a good cause like digging wells in Africa or helping to rebuild homes after natural disasters hit. Spend time with kids in other countries or here to help show them that they too can pull themselves from the dirt and make something of their lives."

"I think that's very noble of you." I smile to him with great enthusiasm "You think you'd go out of high school?"

"I don't know." He looks off into the distance at the clear blue sky "Ideally I might but I haven't really put it all together yet. I'd have to see where things go with school, my parents. Us."

I dart my vision to him as he does the same. I can tell he is thinking what I am yet I do not want to expose him yet for what he is about to say. I don't want to play stupid either, so I give him a look of excited confusion in the hopes of throwing him off and not saying much of anything to him in the wake of our talk.

"Vince I-"

"No." He whispers to me as I silence myself to his smile, making it impossible for me not to smile back "I know why your asking." He chuckles "Truth is there are a lot of variables I would have to weigh before I would ever dream of joining up with something like that. One of those is you." He looks to me with a smile "I wouldn't go if you didn't want me to go, and that's the final word on that." He points up to the sky with a cheezy grin.

"I couldn't do that to you, Vince." I hang my head in shame "I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I held you back from doing something you've wanted to do your entire life."

"There would be plenty of things I could find around here. Soup kitchens, home builds, volunteer gigs around the state I could go and do for a couple days then come back. Doesn't have to be a whole six-month extravaganza. Anything really to just give me a sense of experience and purpose in knowing I've done something good for someone else. That's all I really need." He takes my hand as my body starts to flutter "I wouldn't want to lose the best thing that's happened to me this year because of my own selfish means."

With those words, we share a passionate kiss. His lips locking with mine as we move in close to one another. In an instant I find myself straddling him in the driver seat, pulling all neglect to the knocked over pizza boxes and spilled almost empty sodas on the floor. There is something about his commitment to me that drives me crazy like I would have never imaged it would. All the weeks of holding back and worrying about whether or not he would stay or go seem to flood away from me, and I find myself vigorously making out with him as he traces his hands down my sides and to the top cusp of my jeans, where he stops and traces back up.

Kissing down his neck I stop by the break of his chest and pull back for a second. The two of us locking eyes as the deep parts of our love fill the car with warm air, fogging the windows as he takes his hands off me and puts them by his side. I can tell he is conditioned well now to stop when I do. Something I have come to appreciate over the last week or so but at this moment want to rip his head off for.

I don't bother to say a word. Only bite my lower lip as I take his hand and place is on my first plush left breast, pressing his hand against it as he breathes in deep. One last look between us is all it takes for him to know I have made my decision about him. Tossing myself off him he starts the car up and we are off. I do not know where yet, but I am sure that wherever it is, I am most certainly going to love it.


	11. Chapter 11

Forbidden Lust: New Love  
A Novella: By Benjamin Hale  
Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

I don't bother to wait once we reach the motel, I rush into the room and lay down on the bed. Aside from the fact of being inside a shifty motel where I will now be losing my virginity the overcoming sensation of lust and sexual drive I feel towards Vince is so strong and overpowering I can hardly contain my displeasure with the location by which we chose to do the deed for the first time in our relationship.

The motel we chose was close to us. I'm not sure Vince was thinking all that much about logistics more so throwing the word into google and speeding to the first one he found. I would be lying if I told you it wasn't a turn on to me for some reason, how we are going to be making love in a dirty old motel room on the side of a highway like a couple bandits. Maybe its all part of his game with me but I do not bother to protest one bit. For I am far too entranced with the growing drive that consumes me as I lay on the bed with Vince coming up to me fast.

Throwing himself down on the bed he almost falls off to both of our laughs before grabbing me by the side and pulling me atop him. My body tingles as he traces his hands up and down my body with a look of amazement in his eyes having fixed his sight on me and only me. No one else. The feeling of acceptance and approval coursing through my veins as we share a deep kiss, my lips were swollen from the heavy making out before but the pain is more than an added bonus to me as Vince kisses the nook of my neck and upper chest.

Not wanting to seem inexperienced, I take off my shirt and toss it to the side, revealing to him my plush breasts I have always thought were too big for my small body. I watch for his approval, to which the man's eyes go wide. His hands grabbing out as they firmly grasp each one and squeeze them tight. I can feel his member growing frim with every passing second, something I swoon overcome the smooth gyrations of my hips. My hands placed firmly on his chest as I grasp for his pectoral muscles like they were to save my life.

Tugging at the mans shirt, it takes him a second to let go of my breasts before he rips it off, sitting up to hold me in his embrace before simultaneously grabbing the back hook of my bra and unclasping it, gripping the piece of cloth down to my lap as the teen waists no time digging into my breasts, where he ensures to kiss, nibble and suckle upon each one with equal attention and time. The feeling of pleasure radiating through my body is all but impeccable as I let out a deep moan in approval, his touch so soft, his lips so perfect I can hardly contain myself from squirming with the extreme amount of stimulation that courses through my body.

"Fuck baby yes." I moan as Vince pushes me to the back end of the bed and lays atop me, ignoring my moans as he digs himself into a mood with me. His hands tracing up and down my body as his lips service my lips, neck, and breasts in what seems to be all at the same time. I lay back and let him work, not sure as to what to do next. After tracing my hands across his back and down to his waist I find myself pulling at his pants, to which he quickly kneels up over me with an inquisitive smile and unbuttons them.

The nerves had built up inside me for the last three or so months in waiting for this day do not seem to be there anymore. As I watch him pull down his jeans and throw off his boxers to show his erect member I swallow hard in both fear and anticipation. I know Vince well enough to know he would never do anything I wasn't comfortable with, and I trust that he will allow me to pace myself in a way I feel most comfortable with. There is something about the way he touches me that makes me feel this way, how delicate and gentle he is with my body. I put my total trust into him without so much as a single wavering thought.

Once his pants are off I pull at my jeans to take them off. A smile comes across his face as he shakes his head, placing his hand atop mine so desperately trying to fiddle with the button and zipper. I look into his eyes as his naked body takes frame in my peripheral vision. There is nothing better than the feeling of his touch upon me, and I know now without having even lost it for the night that it will be something that I am going to miss.

Making quick work of my jeans the man throws them off to reveal my soaked pink panties. I am somewhat embarrassed by it, but I do not waver in my thought of this. I lay back and close my eyes as I feel his warm breath followed by light, soft kisses between my thigh. The feeling is sensational, with my growing anticipation of what's to come at the forefront of my mind. His kisses are enough to tease me but not get me off, that being until he pulls aside the cloth of my underwear and slowly slides his tongue inside me. The shock of pleasure sending my body into shivers and my back into an almost U shaped arch. I moan as he tongue fucks me, rubbing my clit with his fingers in the process. I am sure this is the best feeling I have ever come to know, my body feeling as though it were to be in a float down a warm lazy river on the path to enlightened bliss. It's unlike anything I've come to know.

For almost two minutes I lay back and let the pleasure flow through me. My eyes closed and my hands grabbing at the bed sheets I feel myself coming close to orgasm. The feeling has built up inside me for the entirety of my time tonight I shift myself and moan deeply as my lover switches to fingering me and sucking my clit, enough to send me over the edge with a loud scream and soft shutter to follow, his body now removed from mine as I do my best to collect myself from the dizzying aftermath of the incredible session to come onto him.

"Holy shit." I smile out of breath. "Where did you lean that?"

"Trick of the trait." I wink to me as I sit up and kiss him passionately, the taste of my cum still present on his lips and tongue enough for me to clean off his soaked mouth and lay him down on the bed, my legs straddling him on each side as we kiss one another deep, my hips gyrating against his member as I feel it tease the fold of my core, my hand moving ever so slightly as I grab his tick member and tease the outside of my pussy.

"You sure you want this?" He asks me sitting up from his stance. "If you want to take it to slow then let me know."

"No." I tell him pulling aside the flap of my panties "I want it."

There is no protest from Vince on his end, for my taking control of the situation has allowed him to rest back and wait for the good things to start coming his way. A sort of break in the mist of sorts in terms of what we used to have and the things we have now. In stroking his member between my hand I slowly poke at the entrance to my hole, wherein slowly sliding his member into myself I feel his body tense up for a second before relieving as I pierce through the wall of my virginity. It's painful at first, but the wave of pleasure I get soon after in slowly bouncing myself up and down his member is enough to make me swoon with joy and pleasure.

"Fuck." He moans taking my hips as he starts to fuck me, his hard member easing itself in and out of me without so much as a single break in our stride as we continue to go at it. Our position not moving once as our lovemaking turns for fucking to passionate sex. My arms wrapped around one another as we share a passionate kiss with each other through the wake of our lust for each other.

For all the hype that I seemed to put into all this the feeling is amazing, more so then I would have expected from even the wildest dream I had about him. Though it is not as exciting as I would have thought it would be, with my vision being a hard-fought, sweat-filled romp, the first time is never what one would have expected, and I am more than content with where things are now. With time I feel we will carry more exploration and passion then we are now. Then again I can't say for sure. Guess I'll have to take charge of things to spice them up.

In feeling a burst of sluttiness for some reason I can not seem to explain, I hop off the man and pull him atop me. I am close to cumming for the second time and I want him to really drill this one home. Holding him close to me, his labored pants and heavy breath as he fucks me into the bed is all I can think of as my eyes closed and that balloon feeling comes back. There is too much on the line for me to lose sight of what is important, and I try my best to clear my mind as I cum for a second time, the tightening of my pussy around his cock enough to keep my juices flowing as every vein attached to his member seems to pierce my folds with an electric fury like nothing else before.

I can tell he is close by the continuous growth of his breathing in and out and in and out. My body is like jello, a non-factor as we both share deep moans of pleasure. Without warning, I feel his warm seed fill me up. I made sure to take birth control pills from Haley so this wouldn't have been an issue for me. There comes to be a growing sense of warmth inside me, not only from the man's seed but from the love and acceptance I feel from him. The man's boy now limp upon mine I slowly trace my hands down his sweaty back with the touch of an angel.


	12. Chapter 12

Forbidden Lust: Where Do We Go

A Novella: By Benjamin Hale

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

Ever since Vine and I engage one another in a wanton sex romp that night, things between us have been more than exemplary in almost every aspect of our relationship. Losing my virginity was great, and it brought about a whole new sense of accomplishment and feeling within me. It's weird how that kind of stuff works out. There was never a point in time where I thought that a revolution of myself would come as a result of such, but the differences in my almost day to day life have been more than noticed by everyone.

I didn't brag about it. Only to Haley really. My talk to her, however, was more so out of the necessity to fix the kinks in it. I found it a little weird at first talking with her about losing my virginity, but when I got home from that night I just had to tell someone, and Haley was the only person I could think of who could help me with the concerns that I had. Most of them stemming from my lack of exploration and enthusiasm under the sheets with my man. She more or less affirmed the thoughts I already had within myself. That with time and more comfortability there would be.

"You can't expect to have a full connection the first time. Even when losing your virginity." Haley tells me as we sit on the couch and watch the muted television "There's losing your virginity and then there's sex."

In the end, she was right. As time passed almost two weeks between our first engagement Vince and I began to experiment more with different positions and styles. I began to catch on to his mannerisms and the way he worked and moved in bed, adjusting myself to that style and his desires as through a varying assortment of snuck times in my house as well as other places I began to grow much more comfortable with Vince and what we had. As a result of this, our interpersonal relationship began to grow as well. There is more trust between us and more let loose fun that seemed to be much better than the uptight way we were having before. Something I didn't even notice until we began having sex with one another and becoming more fluid with our desires.

Tonight lay no exception to this, as with my parents departed and Haley and Luke out of the house, I invited Vince over for a quick time together. It had become one of my favorite things to do with him. Having a known moment of time where I knew we could have sex and then inviting him over for it in dirty places. For some reason that became a huge turn on for me, allowing me to both cum harder as well as bond with hi more on the fact that for the first time in my life I was doing something that I shouldn't have done. Tonight was no different, as we fucked one another over the kitchen counter, a dirty position in a dirty place that got us both off quite fast.

"We're going to have to clean that up." Vince points to the ground out of breath.

"I'll clean it up later," I said licking my lips as Vince gives me a grossed out smile.

"Not when it's cold. It's like eating frozen frosting."

"And that's a bad thing?" I pull up my pants and hook up my bra.

"No. But on the floor. I'd much rather you use a towel. For your sake."

"Eh." I shrug "I'm more of a dress sock girl myself."

Laughing with each other we exchange a kiss as Vince goes to rifle through the drawers on the search for food, something I notice he does after every single time we have sex together.

"There's some cinnamon roles over there." I point to the countertop "My mom wouldn't mind."

"Hmm." He scratches his chin still shirtless "Best snack to eat after fucking her daughter. Take her rolls."

"Jeez." I shake my head in embarrassment "Such a dork."

"Ah but you love it." He cockily eats the roll "To hot for my own good."

"What are you doing tomorrow?" I asked shaking my head still smiling.

"I got something with my dad." Vince grabs his shirt "Should be interesting."

"What do you have to do?"

"He needs a ride to court." The man finishes his roll "Fighting a speeding ticket he won't win."

I nod my head in serious approval. There has been very few times where Vince will bring up his family, and when he does I always make sure to pay attention. There had always been varying interest with Vince's father and mother as well. Sometimes he is logical, sometimes he is irate with anger. I'd pressed him a couple times on meeting his parents, but he hasn't really shown much interest in that. I'm not sure if he is scared of me meeting them or not, but I have to accept the fact that I may never do that. Its one of those things I guess.

The separation between him and his parents is something more foreign to me, especially given they are together. I seem to be so infatuated with it not because it's out of reach, but because they are married and still live together, yet Vince will always tell me they are nothing but close together in the slightest. Like I'd said before, I respect his wishes of me not to meet them. Although I can not help but think to myself how I want to do it. Just so I can see.

"You still free to meet tomorrow?" I ask throwing on my shirt.

"Yeah." The man does the same "Should be done around noon if you want to grab lunch and go study in the commons. I got a huge science exam coming up I need to prep for."

"I can definitely make that happen." I smile giving the man and hug and smacking his ass as he grabs his backpack and gives me a nod "You want me to drive you back?"

"Nah I can walk." He smiles at me "I need the exercise anyway."

With those words and a kiss the teen waves goodbye to me as he heads out the door. For a minute I stand in the kitchen, cleaning up after our sexual escapade in a weirdly shameful way. While I do enjoy our frequent hookups, there is some kind of feeling I get that makes me wonder if it were the right thing for me to do. I know nothing is wrong with it, and I know it brings both of us a lot of joy and happiness. Steadying our relationship for the better. Yet the most recent times it has brought me a sense of shame and embarrassment how it seems like our interactions are no more than a booty call, and the promiscuous sex between is far from the passionate lovemaking I would have liked to have made with him. The sex is great, but after is what I find myself craving now. Not that the act of sex has been lost upon me, but almost a month into our relationship I would only hope that there would be more there.

Point Of View: Vince Campbell

Alex is amazing, but I can't help but think that there is something wrong with her. Something wrong with me for the way things are going right now. It worries me to some extent that this is what our relationship has come to, and I can see that in her eyes as well. The cold skin nips my face as I walk towards the park, where I will cross through and take a left onto my street. I'd come to like the cold as of recent, seeing it as a cleanse of my thoughts and a chance for me to grow and expand myself as not only a person but as a committed man in a relationship.

Being with Alex is one of the best things that has happened to me in a long time. A far cry from my ex-girlfriend who was more psychotic and crazy than even the craziest people in the world. It's nice to be with someone who respects me and respects the things I want to do. Yet I have come to feel over the last several days that the respect I have for her is sorely lacking from the respect she has for me. It's not so much the sexual aspect but the love and compassion aspect in my eyes. I do not pamper her as much as I would like. I know she is an independent girl, but there is not a girl in the world who wouldn't like to be arranged from outside her window on a cold night. Be brought a cup of hot chocolate on a cold day or even share a nice romantic dinner on the beach.

I'd never been one for romance with my ex. Things were always to crazy or went south before I could put something like that together. With her, I became accustomed to always trying to figure out what was wrong with me and her so I could fix it as soon as possible. With Alex, I do the same, yet I have come to figure out there is not much wrong between the two of us most times. Only what I've made up in my head.

As I walk through the park about one third the way back home my mind begins to fill with the prospect of doing something nice for her. Rock music blaring in my ear I do what I can to try and plan something nice for her tomorrow. A romantic lunch where we can just talk and enjoy one another's company not completely bogged down by sex or the prospect of it. I start to think about a nice picnic or a drive up to my Uncle's cabin in northern California where we could just enjoy nature and spend some quality time together. As I come to think about this I look up in front of me to collect my settings when I catch a hooded man walking towards me brisk like. His head is down so I assume he doesn't know what he is doing but as he approaches and doesn't move I start to worry.

Being robbed in Wisconson multiple times has given me a keen sense of how muggings go. Turning off my music I ball my fists up in my jacket and ready for an attack. Yet just as he reaches within a couple feet of me he stops, causing me to stop as well. I am unable to see his face or who he is, but I know he is up to no good.

"Where are you coming from?" He asks me in a deep voice. My mind doing my best to figure out whom this dark, shadowed man is to no avail while also trying to asses what he wants.

"None of your business." I say stepping back with my hands up "Just trying to get home."

"You're coming from my girl's place." He steps to me with a heavy step "I don't like that very much."

I don't think he would be talking to me about Alex. Maybe he mistook me for someone else. I know this situation can get out of hand and I do not want to make a stupid decision, but my fight or flight is kicking in, the light feeling of numbness starts to take over as I step to him as he does to me, closing the gap between us.

"You got the wrong guy," I mutter in ager as I try to walk away but am pushed back by him, throwing me off balance as he walks to my left side with a snide laugh and tone.

"Alex Dunphy." He says eyeing me down "Don't think I don't know."

"Ahh." It hits me with a wave of relief and joy "Robbie."

"You stay the fuck away from her."

"Or what?" I lean back "You gonna beat me up?"

"That'd be the least of your concerns." He pulls down his hood as the clearly intoxicated man stares me down with a vengeance I was not expecting to see "You came in, and you messed everything up for me." He steps closer to me reeking of booze "I had this all planned out. And you fucked it up."

"Nah." I shake my head stepping up to him myself "You did that yourself."

"Had you not shown up that day I would have had her back by now." The teen pushes me again "Fucking idiot. I know what the fuck you did man she deserves better than that."

"Oh what? A crazy drunk confronting her boyfriend in the middle of the night ready to beat my ass." I push him back harder then he'd done to me "Sure that would go over well."

"Sure as fuck seems better than a woman beating dope head." I ball my fist in anger, ready to punch him in the face at any point I'd like "Seems interesting she'd go for that. That you'd go for someone like her."

"What do you mean?" We stand close to one another as I check the surroundings for anyone else who may see the two of us together here in the park. "Mr. Fucking know it all."

"Death of a loved one can be pretty bad." He smiles wiping his mouth of spit "Your sister and Alex, they seem to look a lot alike. Her obituary, touching. A lot of unsorted feelings between you two it seemed. A failed relationship like your parents would have. I'm interested to see what your ex-looked like."

I don't bother to speak back. The tide of doing right has snapped inside me, and by no logic do I want to reason with the man and his disgusting insinuations or whatever they may be that he is trying to say. Throwing a punch I knock him to the ground. I step back after realizing what I'd done, but his charge towards me snaps me out of it, and a full-on brawl ensues between us right there, in the middle of the park.

Thirty seconds into our grapple for a position the faint sound of a bystander comes across my ears. I know I need to get out of here now before something happens. Throwing the man off me I try to escape but am pushed back to the ground. Looking up, the image of Robbie comes into my sight along with the bystander. The foggy tunnel vision affecting my judgment I kick ahead of me as a figure leans down, a thud and a yell coming from the distance as I snap myself up and see that not only did I take out Robbie, but the bystander as well. Collecting my surroundings, a woman and her dog come running up. My mind screams at me to run, but the good nature in me tells me to stay. I look to my left and find the woman closing it. The right there is a middle-aged man shouting and running towards me on the phone. A faint siren fades into my hearing as I pull myself up and take off running.

I head north, cutting through the wet grass and pathways in the hopes of escaping the park before the cops. A blue and red light catches my vision to the right as a police car pulls up. I panic running to the east now as I try and find a place where I can hide, but I am already made. With the cops screaming at me and nowhere to hide but in the open confines of the park, I stop in my tracks, listening as the sounds of sirens grow louder with the shouts of the officers. I breathe in deep, taking a cold breath of air as I exhale with a smile. I fucked up again.

The cops take me into custody and escort me to jail, where I am processed and questioned for my statement before I am provided my phone call late at night. I didn't get a chance to tell Alex I made it home safe. I am sure she is worried sick about me but there is nothing I can do. I would never call her from a place like this. If anything I would want to hide it from her but from the looks of what the processing officer told me I may be here for a while, as not only have I violated my probation terms but the eyewitness of the assault pointed to me as the aggressor with Robbie in no protest of that statement. I gave my side but even so it's not looking good. I will have to wait for arraignment.

When I am given my phone call the first person I call is Tom. I know he is going to be mad at me, but he is the only person I know whom I can call and will help me out of this jam. I give him a call, picking up on the second ring as his unsuspecting innocence of my bad decision makes me feel even worse with the enthusiasm he has answering the phone after me telling him that it is me on the other end of the line.

"What's up? How was Alex?" He smirks "I'll save her number if this is her's."

"I fucked up," I mutter in pain as my nose stings from the cut across it.

"What happened?" Tom asks with a hurried tone.

"I'm in the county right now." The phone hangs silent for a minute before a heavy sigh comes over it. A lump builds in my throat as the sound of disappointment and anger is projected from the man's voice as I can only guess how angry and upset he is with me after trying to explain this to him.

"What did you do?" He asks monotone.

"I got into a fight."

"With who?"

"Someone in the park."

"Just beat up a random guy in the park.

"No." I cut him off gripping the phone hard "Robbie. Alex's ex-boyfriend."

"Why the fuck would you do that?" The man yells at me "Just walk the fuck away."

"He came at me I had no choice."

"You always have a choice, Vince. You always have a fucking choice." The line goes silent again, my eyes beginning to water as I swallow hard trying not to cry "Jesus Christ Vince."

"I need your help man."

"I can't help you." He breaths heavy "Violated your probation terms they'll lock you up regardless. Even so, I can't come bail you out until after arraignment is set through."

"They wanna charge me with assault one." I whisper into the phone "Five fucking years."

"You shoulda thought about that before you beat that kid up."

"He fucking came after me." I shout standing up "I didn't do shit wrong to that kid, now they want to lock me up on some fucking bullshit now man fuck that."

"What do you want me to tell Alex?" The man doesn't acknowledge my anger in the slightest.

"Don't tell her anything about this."

"She's going to find out." The man affirms "I'm sure she'll know by tomorrow morning."

"She's going to fucking leave me." I shake my head in worry.

"Let me take care of that. Get some rest and get yourself a fucking lawyer."

With that, the phone hangs up. I hold it to my ear for another three to five seconds before hanging up as well. I stare at the reflective mirror wall to see my beat face, messy hair and orange jumpsuit like a flashback to my days roaming the streets like a thug. To think I had come so far only to fall from the graces right when my life was getting good. I turn away from the mirror, unable to look myself in the mirror as I am escorted away.

Point Of View: Alex Dunphy

My phone vibrates my half asleep body awake. The nerves of Vince never responding to me has made me worried, especially since I never received even a notifying text. I lay awake in my bed for hours, trying to get myself to sleep to no avail. I have this gut feeling like something horrible has happened, even though I try to convince myself it is probably nothing more than a mere mistake or blunder on his part. When I get the vibration I shoot up to find an unknown number calling me. I swipe it and answer frantically, an unknown voice coming over it.

"It's Tom." The man sounds worried and tries, my heart sinking as I sit up in bed, sweat sliding down my back.

"Hi," I say unsure of what to do yet don't need to worry about it in the slightest as the man's heavy sigh gives me a heavy sense of worry and does more of the talking for me.

"Just going to come out and say it." Tom exhales deep "Vince got arrested."

"For what?" I ask instantly, on the edge of my bed with suspicion as I wait for a response.

"He got into a fight with someone. I guess your ex-boyfriend came up and tried to take him on. Vince had to defend himself from it and the cops got involved. Simple here say case."

"When's he going to be out?"

"Kind of hard to say." Tom's voice goes lighter "We have to wait for arraignment then the bail will be set." My body goes limp as lay down on the bed feeling somewhat light-headed." With his prior arrests and record, it's hard to say whether or not the judge will be lenient. Only time will tell."

I don't bother to speak a word. For there is nothing to be said anymore. I let the phone hang silent until Tom calls my name three times. I still don't answer. I can't cry, I can't yell, I can't scream. I just lay there, staring at the ceiling with a blank face and a mind full of a jumble. The thought of having a coherent image in my mind is nothing more than a distant memory now as I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I'll have to deal with this in the morning.

For all the strength and triumph I'd gone through for Vince has now been lost. My body weakening as the reality of it all sets in. I would have never expected something like this to happen. A changed man would not make the mistakes of his past. Maybe I was wrong after all?


End file.
